Beyond that, I can't brain. Figuring out what to say escapes me.
After my son's car was totaled and my daughter broke her rib I did a bit of spiral. What do you guys do when anxiety hits you? I tend to retreat. I speak less. I'm quieter. My biggest craving is to be alone. That doesn't work well here (laughing).
It was like my body relaxed after the wedding, hospitalizations, etc....and then when the accident happened and Anna got hurt, it laughed and said. THAT WILL BE THE LAST TIME I RELAX.
People would ask me how I was doing and I'd say, "I'm just so tired." Tears would fill my eyes. I'm not a massive crier, but wow...this year my eyes are Olympians in the fifty rivers dash. NO JOKE!
Finally, about a week ago I was physically not doing well. Sick, but a sick originating from my high stress level for so long. I literally was laid flat. I could do nothing BUT rest. Then one morning I got up with my Heavenly Father. We talked long and hard. I sat and contemplated the wonder of God and what He can do. I realized, in my life I would always have times of tired, but I had been spiritually tired. I needed spiritual rest. God gave me that.
I am now in warrior mode. I feel a heavy need for prayer warriors to stand with us. I cannot share all here, but for those that are not on our facebook group, I will share here what I did there. I will still share a family update below, but right now I'm calling all prayer warriors. If you wish to join us in prayer in more detail, please email me at everlasting_momentum (at) verizon (dot) net
"I was thinking this morning how warriors are not made by laying in the shade, but in war.
Another, very expensive, thing has gone wrong/broke. We are not exactly sure how it will be fixed (100%), though friends are standing with our family and helping as they can.
We are not letting it overwhelm us, because we don't need to see how God will work to know He will.
We have a lot financially before us. Timothy's adoption ($20,000+), some major fixes on broken things that cannot wait (we don't say that lightly), and Christmas coming up.
Right now it is not overwhelming because we see God's presence so completely. We do feel the need to ask prayer warriors to join our family in this fight. We don't know how this can be done, but God does.
Thank you friends...."
So, I sit here tonight with my kids, knowing I don't know how ANYTHING will happen (smile). I'm usually not okay with not knowing. Instead I'm excited to see how God works in this! I'm not sad or down. I am joyous, because to receive a miracle from God, you have to need one.
On an interesting note. The day the latest "expense" happened I remarked to Thomas, "We'll probably get our log in date today." We received an email today and the country started processing our paperwork about the same day as the most recent "event" (chuckle). EVERY TIME something has happened our adoption has taken a jump forward.
It's worth it, sometimes hard, but worth it.
Thank you for standing with us in prayer. Seriously, I feel this need to call all warriors. It means a lot that you guys are among them.
A few pictures and a family update:
Though our arch-nemesis Strep has entered our family...it was after the kids play. They were awesome!
We've done a lot of "hanging out" through the craziness. Our newlyweds, Sarah and Ivan, are doing good (though tired, getting used to full time jobs). Sarah suffered a small concussion that she is still getting over and now has a mild virus on top of it though.
Anna, well...is Anna...chuckle....
Any time she can, she brings her lizards with her.
The last two pictures are of things that truthfully fit where we are right now. I bought this for $3.99 and it is my reminder who is fighting this battle.
This (below), well, speaks for itself.
If anyone knows where I can get these, I want them.
I texted this picture to my husband and this was his response.
"Honey, these have to be earned. They can't just be given."
Have I told you I love my husband?
So as I close down for the night, again I want to thank you for warring in prayer for our family.
You guys ROCK!