Tuesday, June 24, 2014

A Mommy's Heart...I May Alienate Some Readers (Video)

I'm sitting here mid day on the computer.  I am AMAZED.  I have three littles with their blankets and a pillow spread out across the living room.  They're supposed to be having a quiet time....really a rest time.  So I sit here pretending I don't see Jael doing exercises with her prosthetics, Rachel spinning the "egg chair" with her hand, or Gabe playing doggy with his blanket.

I see nothing.

The point really is that I hear nothing.  It IS quiet time.  I'm holding onto that.  Mommy's ears are a tad tired.

(Honesty? CHECK)

Two teens are at work and two middles are at Grandmas doing Literature/Writing/Grammar.  Ben is taking a nap in his bed.  (It's a time he desperately needs due to over stimulation.)   Bekah is the only middle home doing Arithmetic right now.

So, here I am.

Last night I had a dream.  Not a big surprise, but I'm really not sure where this one came from.  I want to share it, but I know this subject is a hot bed of explosion for some.  So I ask you to listen...to understand...from my viewpoint and why my heart is so very involved.

As I slept, I sat in a middle class average house.  The carpet was worn and it was laid out completely different than my home of reality.  We sat in the back room and waited for another group of women to knock on the door.  In the front room my children played.  I knew those with different beliefs were going to be showing up shortly.  I had a flashback (during the dream) of a meeting I had not attended where things had gotten "heated".  This meeting was meant for discussion....not confrontation.  We (those already present) were a group of women that were pro-life.  It wasn't just pro-life in the typical sense, but pro-life as in all life....the elderly, the infirm, and the unborn (just to name some).  It was peaceful in the house.

The knock came at the door.  As the ladies entered, they were just like me and you.  Throughout the front room my littles were at play.  The ladies intermingled as they walked in chatting. One lady bent down smiling at Jael as I walked in.  She was middle age, my age, with brown hair and a longish high ponytail.  She wore very little makeup.  Jael starting chatting...which is not unusual for her (smile).

She (having not met me before) asked me if Jael was my daughter.  I smiled, tears coming to my eyes, and said yes...and she is the reason I am pro-life.  A look of thoughtfulness came into her face.  Somehow I knew she had not been faced with this situation before.  She had a kind face....not cruel as some portray those that are pro-choice.

That was my dream.  It actually meant a lot to me and I felt it pretty profoundly in my heart...especially now, after a recent conversation with our children.

A few nights ago we were doing a devotional as a family.  We were talking about being thankful for what we do have instead of thinking of all the  things we don't.  Each child was asked about something they were thankful for.  I inwardly chuckled, expecting a favorite toy or a favorite food to pop up.  Our kids LOVE food.

That's when Jael took me off guard.  I asked her what she was thankful for.

She said, "Mommy, I'm thankful for life."

I didn't even know what to say.  I was so moved and blown away by such a profound thought from a five year old.


No, she didn't know the full reason.  She doesn't know that many children that are differently abled are aborted before they are given a chance at life.

Friends, I get the thought of not wanting the government to intrude anywhere period (where not necessary).  I do.  I get it.  Believe me, I would like as small government as possible.  I have friends that would never consider an abortion, but call themselves pro-choice.... not wanting the government involved.

Here's the thing....Jael....Benjamin....

The government does make laws that we very much want to keep.  Laws on killing another person.  Laws on drunk driving.  Laws that make it criminal to molest a child.  Oh, (very literally) thank you Lord for these laws.  They are laws that we have to have.

Jael and Benjamin....Tom, Sarah, Anna, Max, Bekah, Gabe, and Rachel....and Jonathan.....

Each of my children make me thankful that life was chosen.  Each of my babies make me think that it shouldn't be a choice.  What if Jael's biological parents had not seen her worth?  Would they have that right ethically...morally? Would I make a choice for them, knowing my child? Yes, without hesitation.

You've met her through this blog.  Could you look Jael in the eyes and tell her different?  Children in the womb are just children that we don't know...yet.  They are children with purpose and gifts to the world we might not understand.

This is not about science, politics, or "rights" really.  This is about life.  This is about the death of my children.  I've lost a child.  It is THE most painful...heart rending of events.  It will effect me for the rest of my life.  My arms still ache to hold Jonathan.  Yet, I would walk that road again in a minute, knowing what an honor it was loving our son.

Oh....and I don't view those that have had abortions as enemies.  I ache for them.  My heart hurts.

I may lose readers for this post, but I wanted to share my mommy heart.

I will to leave you with words between Jael and I.

"Honey, you were made special.  You have been through so much and you are an example of strength and show the world such joy through rough times.  God knew how strong you were.  He knew how people would listen to what you have to say."

"Mommy, God made me this way for a reason.  I am super strong.  I can tell people about Jesus and they'll listen!"

Yes Jael, they will....


  1. Life is wonderful but complicated. And I sure do hate complicated! LOL!! I was reading Ezekial 18 today. God loves us ALL! Each and every one!! (((((((HUGS))))))))
    Very interesting dream!!

  2. This brought tears to my eyes. Such a picture, and one I see myself every day. As I look in the mirror and am grateful my bio mom chose life and as I look into my youngest son's eyes and am grateful that his bio mama chose his life on her 6th pregnancy


In the joy of following our Heavenly Father, we sometimes choose to proceed with a whisper, a verse, or a downright shove...no matter how we follow Him, the momentum that follows is like nothing we've ever experienced before.

Join the momentum...it is a beautiful place to be. It's not always easy, but then the best things never are.

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