Friday, April 12, 2013

Expect the Unexpected~The Answer

The hard part for me was the "unexpected".  We used to "go with the flow" with the unexpected.  That is until the morning of the call.  The morning we were informed Jonathan had died.  Now, well truthfully, the unexpected threw me into a haze. 

Just the information that "if we postponed, it could be months before getting another date".  THAT was THE unexpected.

We had tried to make things as predictable as we could for the kids.  This country we are adopting from is notoriously unpredictable.  We've been on this road before.  Adoption is "expect the unexpected" and we know that.

But our hearts are still tender with the pain and loss of our sweet Jonathan.

It's like walking on unbroken eggshells...some being made out of cement and unbreakable.....some fragile and real.  Every time they give way, it now takes our breath away.  Where as before we "rolled with the punches". 

Literally minutes before writing the last blog post we found the third option and emailed our wonderful stateside coordinator to see if it was possible.

We already knew what we hoped to do before I wrote the last blog post.  We KNEW we couldn't let Benjamin wait, BUT God sees the whole picture that we don't. 

My friend said it best when she said, "I laughed when I got your message.  I knew what you guys were going to end up doing."

It's not that we didn't have the first instinct that many of you shared. 

"Just go and trust God's got this"

We did and do...but still traveling through so much trauma, we needed to pray and be covered in prayer.  I tend to jump in, but God is leading each step....I can't even see where He's placing my foot.  This is a journey of trust.  We ONLY trust God to make the decision...our brains are still foggy with all that has happened (if that makes sense).

Yes, we are going to fly out for the April 22nd date.  My mom and brother are rotating and moving in with the kids.  My friends are stepping up and just blessing us with help.

 We are praying and need to be covered in prayer.  We are praying first for Ben, then for our children and our safety, and last that we are able to do this in two trips and are blessed with a speed (and lack of hiccups) that doesn't make sense to those that don't know our Heavenly Father.  God's got this.  We pray that whatever HIS will is and whatever glorifies HIM the most is the way everything will happen.

Thank you for your prayers!

1 comment:

  1. Praying for you guys! God will go with you...lots of love. Btw, I found your blog via Susanna Musser's blog and have been following for a few weeks. Please know you are being prayed for..and all of your family too.:)


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