Saturday, November 3, 2012

Breaking and The Lies satan Tells About Adoption (National Adoption Month Post 3)

If you are in the middle of the adoption process, you most likely have already faced it.  If you have yet to start, you will.

You see, satan does not like adoption.  The master of lies finds it easier to deceive a child that is in an orphanage or on the street, not covered by the prayers of their parents...not surrounded by a family's love.

Have satan's darts been launched at our family before? Oh yes...EVERY.SINGLE.TIME.

Just to give you an example, you'll find you can almost always expect things to start breaking during the process of bringing a child home.  

Why?

Our minds, our human minds, then go to finances (of which I will talk later about this month).  The goal of satan is to try to get us to NOT proceed. 

Has our family had things broken?  EVERY.SINGLE.TIME. 

Our friend once said that our adoption of Jael was like a soap opera...house fire, car broke into, diamond lost in my wedding ring, termites, roof problems, refrigerator broke, washing machine broke, tall bookshelf broken, our foundation literally exploded, computer monitor broke, toilet broke....etc. etc. etc.

We have gotten to the point that this is just a part of the process we expect.  I say this NOT to cause fear, but to share.  When you follow God and these things start occurring...HAPPY DANCE!!!  The master manipulator is not pleased!!!!  This is a good thing friends...very good.  You are following GOD! What could be better?!! (Smile)

The above is just the beginning of satan's lies (telling you that you can't afford to adopt).  So today, I'm revisiting a post that reminds me that GOD'S truth triumphs!

The Lies satan Tells About Adoption

*Why would God lead you?

*You are far from a perfect parent, let alone a Christian.

*You fail so much, why would He entrust you with another child?

*Don't you EVER want to get your house fixed up or have money in savings to spare? Don't you ever want to retire? You're stupid for thinking that you should do this. You don't even have college funds and have to budget for everything. How is that fair to your family?

*What if you/your spouse loses your job? Where will you be then with another mouth to feed? What if something happens to you and you leave your spouse with even more children to care for?

*You won't be able to raise that kind of money.

*Do you know what everyone will say if you adopt AGAIN? Think about the stress you'll have to deal with.

*What if you fail? What if you can't handle it?

*You need to get everything in order and perfect before you even consider this.

*Others don't understand, maybe you didn't hear God right.

*You shouldn't have to fight for something if it's God's will. It should be easy. This obviously isn't God's will.

*What about your other children? This is too much for them to handle.

*You have too many children, shouldn't you just help someone else adopt?

*What if you make a mistake? This really isn't your child and this child is so emotionally damaged with some disorder or syndrome that they RUIN your family.

*You are not good enough for this. You don't deserve it.

*Just take a deep breath, let it go, and go on with your life. It will be much easier.


What satan does not tell you...

*Why would God lead you?

He loves you as it says in John 3:16. Why else would He give His Son for YOU.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

He uses the imperfect (us) to bring Him glory as stated in I Corinthians 1:27. I am personally praising God for this (smile).

"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong."

*You are far from a perfect parent, let alone Christian.

God sent His Son to die because NONE of us are perfect and we are all sinners. There are great parents out there, but ALL are human and fall short. If we listen to this reasoning then no orphans would find their forever families.

"...for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23

*You fail so much, why would He entrust you with another child?

This is one of satan's favorite lies.

Remember...."...for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23

AND

"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong." 1 Corinthians 1:27

*Don't you EVER want to get your house fixed up or have money in savings to spare? Don't you ever want to retire? You're stupid for thinking that you should do this again. You don't even have college funds and have to budget for everything. How is that fair to your family?

I see this lie often told to men, many times the main providers in a family. There is so much pressure to provide not only material comforts, but savings, college funds, retirement, and such as well. We live in a rich country, though often we do not feel rich. There are many things expected that I don't believe have a Biblical foundation, yet we blindly accept.

There IS a Biblical foundation for providing for our families though.

Take 1 Timothy 5:3-4
"Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need. But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God."

Also, 1 Timothy 5:8
"If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever."

These make it very obvious that there is a responsibility to provide when possible.

It is also very clear that we are to be good stewards of what is given us and provides guidance toward saving and staying out of debt.

"In the house of the wise are stores of choice food and oil, but a foolish man devours all he has." Proverbs 21:20

"The wicked borrow and do not repay." Psalms 37:21

So we do not get to completely dismiss the responsibility we hold to our families, but we need to do two things. First is to remember that what the world views as necessary is not always what God does. Search the Bible and ask yourself, "Do I see a Biblical foundation that says God finds this necessary?"

Second, we need to look at Christ's life and those closest to Him. You see, when those in the Bible followed God (this includes adoption, as taking care of the orphans is a command in James 1:27) there was not an expectation of bank accounts building up. There was not an expectation of worldly blessings. When God calls us, it does not negate the fact that we need to provide, but even MORE importantly providing does not negate the fact that we need to follow God.

"As Jesus looked up, he saw the rich putting their gifts into the temple treasury. He also saw a poor widow put in two very small copper coins. 'Truly I tell you,' He said, 'this poor widow has put in more than all the others. All these people gave their gifts out of their wealth; but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on.' Luke 21:1-4

Does this say the widow was criticized for giving everything she had to God? No, she was praised for giving all she had to Him.

When we are doing the work God clearly commands us to do, we give our all. We give everything. Bringing orphans into family is God's work.

"Better is a little with righteousness, than great income with injustice." Proverbs 16:8

Finally, we need to look at Christ's words alone in several different verses.

"Now as Jesus was walking by the Sea of Galilee, He saw two brothers, Simon who was called Peter, and Andrew his brother, casting a net into the sea; for they were fishermen. And He said to them, 'Follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men.'
Immediately they left their nets and followed Him." Matthew 4:18-20

Christ didn't tell them to go back and gather their possessions when asking them to follow Him.

"Still another said, 'I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say goodbye to my family.' Jesus replied, 'No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.'” Luke 9:61-62

"When Jesus heard this, he said to him, 'You still lack one thing. Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.'” Luke 18:22

*What if you/your spouse loses your job? Where will you be then with another mouth to feed? What if something happens to you and you leave your spouse with even more children to care for?

We would do nothing for God if we are truly held captives by tomorrow. We wouldn't let our children out of the house if we really realized how temporary life is. Would we spend time going to a movie or would we rather walk through the park chatting. We can plan for a future that MIGHT be, but we cannot plan for every eventuality without driving ourselves crazy.

Do we have life insurance? Yes, but we can't negate God's will with "what ifs". Can we save? When we can...yes.

What it comes down to is trusting God and that He has led us. He's not going to drop us or let go of our hands. HE will provide.

"Now listen, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.' Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes." James 4:13-14

"Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Luke 6:38

"Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?" Luke 12:22-25

*You won't be able to raise that kind of money.

YOU don't need to raise this kind of money. Adoption is expensive and God does not tell you to follow Him without providing a way to do it. Sometimes it means work, but more importantly it means trust. During this last adoption we couldn't even have applied for a loan. We began the adoption with nothing and yet God provided again and again.

We may have used EVERY penny, but sleeping in cribs behind me are two amazing blessings.

You may try to convince yourself (if you have adopted before) that last time you had things you could sell or another avenue that is not available. You then need to ask yourself, do you really think you provided OR did God?

Here are some verses quoted already and some new and very important ones.

"Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Luke 6:38

"And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?" Luke 12:24-25

"Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. As it is written: 'They have freely scattered their gifts to the poor; their righteousness endures forever.' Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness." 2 Corinthians 6:7-10

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened." Matthew 7:7-8

Lastly, this is the verse we clung to while we strove to bring Gabe and Rachel home.

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart."Psalm 37:4

*Do you know what everyone will say if you adopt AGAIN? Think about the stress you'll have to deal with.

We are not here to please others. It actually states in the Bible that, at times, families will face off against families (Luke 12:51-53). We are on this earth not to please man, but God. It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks.

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. Remember what I told you: A servant is not greater than his master. If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also." John 15:18-20

This does not mean persecution will only come from those who do not know Christ, but we do need to understand that it is not about others. They may not see Christ from the perspective we do. It's as if we all stand around a circle, with God at the center. Some may stand next to you and understand what you see, but some may stand across the circle from you and do not understand from your perspective, because they view God from another place in the circle.

*What if you fail? What if you can't handle it?

We have failed in the past and we can assume we will fail in the future. Though satan seems to enjoy this lie. It is not about our failures, this is just a diversion. It is about God's triumphs.

As to handling it? This verse says it perfectly.

"No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us."Romans 8:37

This verse is a good reminder too.

"No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can endure it."1 Corinthians 10:13

*You need to get everything in order and perfect before you even consider this.

This one is a little funny when you think about it. You see, nothing is ever perfect. There is one (satan) that will make sure of that (if that is what you are waiting for). There is no such thing as perfection. We follow God, not because we OR our lives are in order, but because He commands us to.

"And whoever does not carry their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple." Luke 14:27

*Others don't understand, maybe you didn't hear God right.

From personal experience, when God talks to you...you know. It may be just for an instance, but there is an absolute certainty. Very quickly, you will find, satan will try to convince you otherwise. Others are not required to understand. Sometimes time will have to pass while God works on their hearts, but if you know the will of God (and you know that it is backed up by the scriptures) hold onto it. Don't let satan convince you otherwise.

"Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:2

*You shouldn't have to fight for something if it's God's will. It should be easy. This obviously isn't God's will.

God doesn't say following Him will be easy. Actually, He says just the opposite. Again, John 15:18-20 and Luke 14:27 are some verses we need to look at.

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. Remember what I told you: A servant is not greater than his master. If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also."

"And whoever does not carry their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple."

*What about your other children? This is too much for them to handle.

Really? This one just doesn't stand up either. Think about what we are teaching our children when we follow God in adoption? Love? Devotion? Adoption, as God adopted us, into a family formed in such a cool way?

"For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.And by him we cry, “Abba,Father.” The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory." Romans 8:14-17

What an amazing way for our children to learn about OUR adoption as sons and daughters.

*You have too many children, shouldn't you just help someone else adopt?

Being called to help someone else does not negate God's call for us. If He has called you to adopt, it is not your choice (or we should not make it that) for us to decide that helping someone else is fulfilling what God is telling US to do.

While we aid the orphans and other's adoptions (which is AWESOME), there is a child, waiting in an orphanage or foster home, that is a child meant for OUR family. If we choose to negate God's calling for us, then OUR child may remain an orphan.

"The mind of man plans his way, but the LORD directs his steps." Proverbs 16:9

*What if you make a mistake? This really isn't your child and this child is so emotionally damaged with some disorder or syndrome that they RUIN your family.

God does not promise everything will be easy. Our children will come to us wounded. How could they not? What He asks us is to trust Him and follow Him. This is not a worry we can dwell on. It is not a lie we can buy into. We cannot know about tomorrow. We can read, become more knowledgeable, prepare, but we cannot base our decision (as stated previously) on what MAY happen or we will be frozen in inaction.

"Now listen, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.' Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes." James 4:13-14

*You are not good enough for this. You don't deserve it.

This is one that is thrown in the faces of so many (me included). We do not deserve any of this, but God loves us anyway. He blesses us. He loves us.

The lies satan tells to destroy us are, at times, almost humorous.

Sometimes I feel like screaming/laughing (at satan) from a mountain top, "You are RIGHT! I don't deserve it! Christ gave His life for me and I don't deserve it! He blesses me anyway so GO AWAY!"

God wins, satan doesn't like that. It's not about "deserving" it's about blessing.

"...for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23

*Just take a deep breath, let it go, and go on with your life. It will be much easier.

Easier? Maybe, but not as fulfilled, full of laughter, hugs, love. A child may remain an orphan if we "let it go". It's a battle worth fighting.

Easier? Maybe, but then we don't get to live with the knowledge that we are following our Heavenly Father.

satan will try to make us busy and forget God's call, putting it in the back of our minds.

I have saved James 1:27 for last.

We can't forget.
"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

satan is the world. satan doesn't want you to adopt and teach a child about God and His love. Following God may not be easy, but we all know who wins. It is VERY worth it.

Don't let satan's lies drive you.

Let God's truth carry you.


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In the joy of following our Heavenly Father, we sometimes choose to proceed with a whisper, a verse, or a downright shove...no matter how we follow Him, the momentum that follows is like nothing we've ever experienced before.

Join the momentum...it is a beautiful place to be. It's not always easy, but then the best things never are.

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