Monday, September 3, 2012

At the Hospital and Blessed

It's almost 10:00 pm and my eyes are barely staying open.  Little miss is solidly asleep to the sound of a kids show on television.  When things got too quiet, she wanted to turn it on.  To some extent I'm giving her whatever she wants right now...whatever helps her not be so afraid that is...within reason.

We started this afternoon by packing/getting ready....
... a HUGE suitcase.  I won't tell you half of it is filled with toys friends sent (and a few from us).  I won't tell you that. 
...a wagon that took me FOREVER to get snuggly like I wanted (a gift from my mom).
...my backpack/purse.

...a cooler, snacks, a diaper bag, and toys for seven kids tomorrow (ok, so our teens may not need the toys).

...clothes and shoes for seven kids still at home. Slave driver mom made them lay out their stuff since they have to get up at 4:30 am.

Later, Thomas sat us all down and we had a family devotional.  My heart just about exploded with love for my Heavenly Father and family.  This may be big, but God is so much bigger. By the time we got to the praise song, eyes were misting (ok, it was only me, though a couple kids looked a little teary eyed...smile).

Finally we made it to the hospital. 




Though she may not have looked it in the pictures above, Jael is nervous.  She wanted to get back in the wagon and pack back up her things. 

After a bit, she also wanted to look through our "pictures" to prepare for surgery.  For the first time since the very first moment we looked at them, she was scared.  "No want" came out of her mouth for the first time since the beginning.

I watched her almost talk herself back into being excited...almost.  As she drifted off in my arms snuggled up in bed, she cracked her eyes open and said, "Mommy, I get new legs?"  I looked at her and whispered, "Yes honey, you get new legs."

I don't know what the hardest thing as a mommy I've faced.  I can think of several.  Most when a child was hurting...emotionally hurting and I couldn't fix it.  This though, this is a different kind of hard.  Her eyes trust me...

My husband pointed out that this is what God our Father does.  He lets us go through painful and hard things, because he knows the good that will come out of them.  How it must hurt Him when his children have to suffer, even when future joy will overflow.  We are made in His image after all...and THIS is not easy.  It is good, blessed, and right...but not easy.

May your night be full of blessings.  Mine will be, I get to go snuggle back up with my daughter.


"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."  Joshua 1:9


2 comments:

  1. You are ALL SO VERY PRECIOUS. Much Love.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Woke up at 3:30 this AM with you all on my mind and just breathed a word of prayer asking God to be with you, the doctors, and the nurses as Jael is recovering. May He give you the strength and patience, and a quick healing for Jael.

    ReplyDelete

In the joy of following our Heavenly Father, we sometimes choose to proceed with a whisper, a verse, or a downright shove...no matter how we follow Him, the momentum that follows is like nothing we've ever experienced before.

Join the momentum...it is a beautiful place to be. It's not always easy, but then the best things never are.

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