Approval!!!

Just recieved our I800 approval (immigration) and now pray our next step (NVC letter) will come within days!!! 

Still struggling with the tail end of a stomach bug, but this is AWESOME news and had to share!

Seeing if this Blogging from a phone works!

Gas Tanks Empty

Yep, here I am again. Asking for prayers. Though we have yet to get our I800 approval (would cherish prayers for that and to bring Jael home by Christmas), I am (going for truth here) existing on no reserves and no strength. God is propping me up, lifting my feet, and breathing for me. He is my ONLY strength.

It's like trying to drive a car on an empty gas tank.

We just got hit again today. I can't go into extreme detail, but a couple thousand in finances that we thought would be there for the adoption (travel) may not be. satan doesn't want Jael home.

Normally this wouldn't phase me. It's not fear so much as feeling battered. Fires, explosions, etc. etc. etc.....I feel like we're constantly recovering.

With every adoption I've learned something. God has taught me. With this one, it's reliance. I thought I had that one down. Now that I am empty, I know what it is. A hard and painful lesson, but I know worth it.

Though I cry a little while saying it, I'm glad God is honoring me with it. Who needs to be comfortable...I've never prayed for that...I want grow. Growing is painful.

Thank you for your prayers friends. I could really use them.

AND THE WINNER IS....FINALLY

Yes, I am currently a member of the land of the living! Feeling pretty gnarly, but I am here (smile).

After many promises (and days in bed not knowing what day it was)...we finally picked a winner! We really did intend to earlier, but found that I would doze off and before I knew it, it was the next day. Urg....

Before I announce the winner (yep, I'm proctastinating), could you guys keep our I800 (immigration paperwork) in your prayers. It's taking A LOT longer than anticipated and we havn't been able to get a hold of anyone. This is one of the last two quick steps before our travel date can be assigned. Can you please pray we get the approval paperwork this week and (if the Lord wills) we have Jael in our arms before Christmas? Thank you!

And the winner is....
AMY P at "Boy oh Boy Oh Boy!"

I'll be emailing you shortly!

Also, keep checking back for the next TCU video giveaway when we receive our travel assignment!!!! We have one more of my favorites left and can't wait to share it with you!!!

Sick as a dog...will be posting winner of the DVD (though not as elorborately...smile) later today. My daughter is writing out names and extra entries and putting them in a hat for me. Hugs and thanks for letting me wallow without reaming me...smile.

And the Winner...

....will be announced tomorrow (URG!).

It has been a rough week with my husband being gone (he came back today). I am beyond weary (think fetal position).

Apologies, Hugs, and thanks for the patience!

Adoption~Eternal Perspective~The Ache

As I stared at the phone, memorizing the number of USCIS (Immigration), I realized that this is giving me just a hint of what God must feel.

The Ache

Across the miles plays a child, not mine by birth, but mine none the less. I wait for paperwork, officials, and yes...governments to recognize what my heart already knows...what God has shared with me in a whisper.

I ache to hold her in my arms. My heart physically hurts. The gnawing, my stomach feels so sick at the intensity of the longing.

I found myself wondering this morning why this was. Should I just know God has me and our daughter? Is this a lack of faith? Shouldn't I just be able to focus on our children here, knowing God keeps His promises?

Yet still the ache is there...painfully...burrowing into my body.

That's when the chills came. That's when I realized that this is not a lack of faith. This is how God must feel.

We were made in His own image.

Our Children....

Our children, reachable, yet unreachable.

Our children we can feel in our arms before we've ever held them. We wait for paperwork and governments to move so we can wrap our arms around them.

Our children.... that the thought of losing makes taking a breath virtually impossible creating a hole that could only be filled in Heaven... when they are in our arms.

To Our God....

To our God, we are reachable, yet unreachable when we turn our backs. He has given us this choice.

To our God, how He longs to hold us in His arms. Waiting for us to get through our "paperwork"...our "issues" and turn to Him.

To our God...the thought of losing us, because we turn our backs on Him...must feel like a hole being carved out of His heart.

To our God, we endure just a droplet of what He does daily.

What an honor that He gives us this to understand...just a smidgen...

This pain and this longing will go away. Our journey will be complete.

Yet God's pain waits for our bodies to be redeemed unto Him. These bodies, these shells, these temporary vessels are not comparable to eternity.

Adoptive parents have just a taste. Parents that have suffered loss have just a taste.

The saltiness of loss, of love, of longing.

In time, we need to remember this pain when we walk by those on the street...those that don't know him...the prostitute, the homosexual, the drug addict, the thief, the murderer, the alcoholic, the liar, the "easy" girl or guy, those that seem toxic...we need to remember that God longs...painfully longs...for each of His children...and that we are one of them.

We are the hypocrite, the liar, the sinner...and so much more.

Just as we cannot turn our backs on our children....WILL NOT turn our backs on our children.

God awaits us.

He waits for us to wake up and take HIS CHILDREN into OUR arms, until He Holds them in His.

The ache is nothing. His arms are EVERYTHING.

Screaming from the Heart of Adoptive Parents

Sometimes our hearts seem to scream, scream from the mountain tops, "Why don't you understand?!!!"

I've tried to blog about it. Yet, a 15 year old put it into words that I couldn't form. My heart broke and screamed in affirmation...

In the words of a young woman comes the heart of God for orphans...and for His children.

"Love" on Fearless

It doesn't matter, in terms of this blog, that she's my daughter. She is my sister in Christ with her heart rent for the lost of this world.

Budding Ethiopian Opera Singers

Make a video - it's fun, easy and free!
www.onetruemedia.com

Break Ins and Pieces of Cement

God has blessed us. He has honored us and favored us. There is no saying thank you for everything that God has done. He's granted us a three year old Heaven sent blessing named Jael.

I've shared our trials (or storms) over the past months, not to say "woe is me", but to show you how amazing God is. It could have been SOOOO much worse! God has put a hedge of protection around our family and this journey to our daughter. Not the measly "get a pair of hedge clippers" kind, but the cement/100 ft tall/10 feet thick barrier. Ya, exhausting and wearying stuff has happened, but it could have been so much worse...and through these things God has brought out amazing and very cool stuff.

This morning we had another mini storm. Yup, it's frustrating, but in the big picture...mini.

We woke to the head deck of our stereo system gone and our dash broken and pulled off our van. It was parked right in front of our house (in front of a main window). My husband was up until around 2:30am, so someone was bold (not in the best way).

It was cool hearing the police officer talk about how important it is to continue to follow God. Can anyone say "God's Hand"? We are completely confident that's God's Hand is apparent.

This thief is really in trouble, because....we're gonna pray for them...and pray for them....and pray for them. Dude, they DID NOT know what they got themselves into.

We've got God and the "stuff" of this world perishes.

God wins, that's it....

Oh, thought you might enjoy seeing what we did with a big piece of our "exploding sidewalk".

Pictures are by my sweet daughter, Sarah.

The Mommy Pill !!!!

We've all waited for it. We've all longed for that illusive pill that automatically solves all the most common "mommy" problems. Wait no more, it's here!

One little pill creates solutions for what ails the average mom.

YES, IT IS A MIRACLE DRUG!!!


It doubles the energy of the average mom to twice that of her children!

Sleep cleaning is now a dream of the past!

Those "eyes in the back of your head"? Wait no more!


But if you think that's all, think again!


It escalates the "mommy look" rendering any and all disrespect useless.

Lost shoes? This pill creates a mommy magnet and makes it impossible for those frustrating shoes to hide.

And you know the disease "If I do it wrong the first time my wife will never ask me again"...CURED!


If you order now it comes with the supplement, "All chores done with no complaints/playing/or having to ask twice"

Yes, it is a miracle my friends!

Side effects include:
*Sock monster increases in intensity.
*Ears become hypersensitive and may cause eventual hearing loss.
*Irritability of familial infrastructure due to the pills fantastic ability to render others situational escalations useless.

Warnings:
*Should not be taken by mothers that are pregnant, may become pregnant, or have been pregnant (paper pregnancy included).
*The pills performance is negatively impacted by by any contact with oxygen (including and not withstanding after ingestion).

Only 1500 payments of $19.99!!!

Act now!

Void in all countries with carbon based life forms.





(Yes, I'm a complete goof.)

Adopting Out of Birth Order

Many agencies don't allow it. Some require intensive training. A few require the request of a waiver to adopt out of birth order.

Do we agree with these policies? Yes and No...clear as mud, right?

We do believe that "out of birth order" adoption should be allowed.

We just can't see ourselves saying, "God led you to your child, but that's not good enough."

Side Note: We understand the thought process behind the rule and do not believe for a second there's any malice or unkindness (only thoughts of protection) behind it.

Now the intensive training some agencies require, THAT we can get behind. We've seen the devastating consequences of a family not being prepared. The worst case scenario DID happen.

There are often a few main reasons that agencies will give a big "X" to the thought of adopting out of birth order. We've sat down and thought a lot about these things recently since our newest blessing is not coming home in birth order.

Reason #1: Our children had lives before us. Abuse (sexual/physical/emotional) may have taken place. Records we receive as adoptive parents are not all inclusive. Sometimes events are left out because the knowledge isn't there. Sometimes they are left out purposely. Not every abuse leaves a mark. Even a doctor may not be able to tell initially.

Unfortunately, abuse is sometimes the only thing a child knows. It may have been done in secret (thus teaching them to do it in secret).

Many children from hard places will try to exert their control in a world that is new and seems out of control. The abused child may become the abuser. These children are hurt. They are precious, but have been taught no different.

It doesn't matter if we think, "It can't happen to us"...because denial doesn't equal reality. We've known it to happen. This IS the worst case scenario. A family torn apart after they discovered that their other children (bio and adopted) had been terrorized and horribly, nightmarishly abused by a newly home child. This is all the child knew.

Even knowing this, we (as NON professionals) do have some issues with this reason for not allowing out of birth order adoptions.

*Age does not determine size. A younger child may be larger than an older. A younger child may be more aggressive or manipulative than the older. They have often suffered the ravages of the world to a MUCH greater degree. Two of our children, two years apart, are almost the exact same size with the younger being a little taller.
*The horror can occur whether you are adopting in birth order or out of birth order. Birth order doesn't seem to be a determining factor in the knowledge of what trauma our children have been through.

We AGREE with the concern. We think parents need to recognize that we can believe in our kids, but understand and prepare to get the help our children may need and face the reality that they had a life before us. We also think that these kids are precious gifts from God and worth the fight.

Alarms on the doors, co-sleeping in a bed in your room, no alone time until you can see the behavior is not coming up, talking with ALL your children intensively before the home coming, counseling/therapy...these are just a handful of suggestions/ideas to protect ALL your children INCLUDING your new child who may need to be protected from themselves. We are not professionals and these ideas are just a start.

Reason #2: All children need to be the baby at some point.

With approximately 147,000,000 orphans in this world, not enough families are answering the call. There are not enough arms to be snuggling in when night terrors come. There are not enough parents out there to say, "We will fight for your spirit and through your brokenness. We will do everything THAT WE CAN DO to show you that you are worthwhile."

Not only that, but when God leads you to your child...they are YOUR child.

There are a lot of things that "should be", but I would like to make a couple statements below to say instead of "all children need to be the baby at some point".
Every child deserves a family.
Every child deserves love.

These children have had their lives altered already from what "should be". We can't change all of that. There is no going back. We need to focus on the fact that "love" and "family" (and that we all now are one) is what IS and go from there.

After being a parent for a little while, I've learned that all my children need to be the baby, BUT that doesn't necessarily mean they have to be the youngest. We, as parents, have to make the effort to give our newest family members the time to feel cherished and unique. We must go above and beyond to form the attachments that should have come at a younger age.

So, the baby issue? Very truthfully, not to be ugly, is a nonexistent issue for us. Prepare? Yes. Love? Yes. But if being the baby in the family is the criteria, then I think that many families would lose out on the blessing God has intended for them.

Reason #3: A child will be displaced in the birth order of your family.

Every time a child is born, the youngest child is displaced. The youngest child, who is not mature enough to understand, is displaced. Did I mention my oldest didn't talk to me for 24 hours when his little sister was born (yes, it was a little funny). Our daughter Anna played with her new little Russian brother in the orphanage and after an hour looked at us and asked if we could give him back now.

I have heard some rough stories of transitioning when a little one comes home. Several friend's children acted up CONSTANTLY when their siblings were born, wanting more attention and doing whatever they could to get it.

Displacement happens.

Yes, sometimes it may be difficult for an older/middle child (after all, they've had their position longer), but they ARE old enough to have many discussions BEFORE the fact and many afterwards. It can be hard, but then life can be hard. I think somewhere down the line we stopped giving our children credit. We stopped expecting our kids to use self control, to talk to us, to share when they are struggling (this is talking about children that have the solid foundation). They won't come to us every time (just as we don't). They may turn to God (hopefully this is done first even).

Yes, we have to be open and approachable. We have to talk and share the possible struggles. Yet, just as with any major transition, it can be done and HAS been done successfully.

Just because things may be hard, does NOT mean they are not worth it. Through some of the greatest trials, come the greatest triumphs.

The issue of adopting out of birth order is not an issue of "doable". It is an issue, as with anything, of following God. When you follow God, all things are possible. "Doable" pales in comparison.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans8:28