If you are interested in adoption or just wanting to find out more about the ways you can help orphans around the world, please head here.



Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Three Children in the Double Digits


Seriously?! Seriously?! How am I old enough to have THREE children in the double digits?!

Anna turned ten this month. Now I have a 16, 14, 10, 8, 4 year old, and two 1 year olds. I am feeling older all the time.

Anna is our baby that said "I love you" at 2 weeks old...no joke...no proof, but the meds for birth recovery weren't THAT strong.

She is our bug lover (which is great for losing weight when she places the cage on the kitchen counter). She wants to be a bug vet.

*I'm not sure how often I will be visiting her job of choice (wink).

She is also a ray of warmth on a dark and cold day. Her tender heart sheds many tears for those less fortunate (which, yes, at times may include ants).

She is especially a blessing from our Most High God.

Happy Birthday our sweet ten year old. For every year that we have had with you, we praise our Heavenly Father.

We can't wait to see what God has in store for your life!


Yep, all the kids get to wear this beautiful hat!



Monday, November 29, 2010

Very Special Video-The Rogers Family Home Coming

This adoption video is very special to me.

I remember sitting next to our daughter Sarah on our Ethiopian Airlines flight (just five months ago) and looking up as this beautiful woman asked, "Are you Kat?"

Ethiopia is not too far for God to work and for anyone to say, "This is SUCH a small world!"

Another family from our agency, traveling when we were, adopting from the same orphanage, using the same lawyer, AND another large home schooling family...just HAPPENS to be on the same flight. God is just amazing like that!

Seriously cool and seriously gorgeous family....

*Thank you all who are allowing me to share your videos here! I don't know about you, but every time I see one of these videos, God touches my heart again. If you have a video you would allow me to share here, please let me know.



Please don't forget to keep praying!
"A Life Outside the Box-A Call to Prayer"

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Prayer Warriors-Tomorrow Morning

A fellow blogging family has been on my heart for so long. They have been trying to bring their children home from Guatemala for five and a half years...seriously. They are asking for prayer, specifically tomorrow morning, for resolution. Please consider reading more about their story at *A Life Outside the Box* and praying with them.

"Kat" apulting into Thanksgiving


My bro was working on Thursday, so we decided to have our Thanksgiving celebration today instead. After all, the major emphasis we usually put on Thanksgiving is...well, giving thanks to God for all we have. Family is a big part of that!

This Thanksgiving has the added benefit of being the first one with Rach and Gabe... a definite "Amen!" there. God has been so amazingly good to us!

Here is a little peek into our Thanksgiving celebration in all it's fun and craziness!















We had a blessed night with our family (including my mom and bro, but they may kill me if I post pics of them though).

When going around the table our two oldest teens said that they were thankful that God loves us even when we blow it. They said it a little more profound than that, but you get the gist.

We all fall short, and at this time of year it's easy to focus on everything but what we need to be. I too am thankful that in my boundless blunders of sin, God...my amazing Heavenly Father...forgives me. God's gifts amaze me.

Thank you God. Thank you for being the great I AM.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

WOO HOO! Another Adoption Homecoming Video!

Thank you all who are allowing me to share your videos here! I don't know about you, but every time I see one of these videos, God touches my heart again.

If you have a video you would allow me to share here, please let me know.

This is the beautiful uniting of the Baggett family. It touches my heart. How amazing is God's plan for our families!


To read more about their sweet family, click on the following link.
"Our Family Tapestry"

"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4


Friday, November 26, 2010

Shopping With A Purpose (Updated March 2011)

Often we forget the power of our purchases. What we buy can sometimes reflect what we support. This is a WONDERFUL way to support those in need. Some are raising funds for adoptions and some are supporting WONDERFUL causes. Though I hope to keep these updated, please forgive me if some links are no longer valid. With seven (soon to be eight) children, it's getting harder to spend much time sifting through which families have brought their children home and which products are still being offered. What I hope to do is go through these a couple of times a year. Many of these are still up and running and I actually hope to add more soon. If you are fund raising, don't hesitate to let me know. I am going to start putting the date that each is added after each link. Let me know if a link is no longer necessary!

Have a blessed time shopping and know you are blessing others through your purchases!

(1)The Lowery family is using "Just Love Coffee" to help fund their adoption. For every item sold they receive $5 toward their adoption. They also have a "Just Love" Beanie that would be awesome for a teen (and finding things for teen boys is NOT always easy).- "Just Love Coffee-The Lowerys" Added 11/10

(2) A candle holder (with candle) that has a child's hand print pressed into it. Each candle sold will feed a child for a week. Signals catalog is working in conjunction with the Christian Organization "Rice Bowls".-"Signals" Added 11/10

(3)Tom's shoes-With every pair of shoes you purchase, Toms will give a pair of shoes to a child in need.-"Toms Shoes" Added 11/10

(4)A blog with many links to places where you can shop with a purpose-"Shoppin' With A Purpose"-There are links to 43 sites where you can make a difference with your purchases. Added 11/10

(5)Dolls and T-Shirts to benefit the Young family adoption-"Some Youngs" Added 11/10


(6)Coffee Tumbler, T-Shirts, and Ornaments-Ordinary Hero-"Ordinary Hero Blog" Added 11/10

(7)Scentsy Buddies-Benefiting the Creveling family adoption-Just order from this site and email the owner (Click the "Contact" tab) and let them know it's for the Creveling's adoption!"The Creveling's Adoption-Scentsy Buddy" Added 11/10

(8)AHOPE Store (Closing Soon)-AHOPE for children has an orphanage in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia specifically for HIV positive children."The AHOPE Store" Added 11/10


(9)"Hope for Dube Bute".-Changing the lives of a whole village living in poverty in Ethiopia. They have a new store."Bow in the Clouds Gifts" Added 11/10

(10)Adoption T-Shirts and other products-Benefiting the Horne family adoption-"Adoption T-Shirts" Added 11/10

(11)Selling multi-cultural dolls to help orphans-"A Doll's Heart" Added 11/10

(12)Album to raise money for family adopting from Ethiopia-"Benji Goodrich". Added 11/10

(13)50% of all proceeds from these natural skin and hair products go to one of three Ethiopian charities-"Give All for Love". Added 11/10

(14)This is a neat blog that has some other cool links to help adoptive families and/or links to help promote adoption."The Wayfarer:Ethiopian Adoption Resource Blog". Added 11/10

(15)A Christian News Blog with many more ways to shop with a purpose."Cyber Monday: Give scarfs, greeting cards, coffee or chickens for Christmas (Updated)". Added 11/10

(16)A Christmas Ornament sold to raise money for Judah (a very sick infant in Ethiopia)"Baby Judah-Ethiopian Handmade Coffee Bean Ornament". Please continue to raise up baby Judah in prayer. He has Hydrocephalus and needs to come to the U.S. for treatment. Added 11/10

(17)Target-Heart 4 Hearts Dolls- Part of proceeds raise funds for children's causes in the countries the dolls symbolize (through World Vision)."Target-Hearts 4 Hearts Doll". Added 11/10

(18)A beautiful necklace sold by the "We Heart Ethiopia" blog raising funds for girls as they age out of Kechene Orphanage in Ethiopia."We Heart Ethiopia-Kechene OTO Charm Necklace is HERE!". Added 11/10

(19)The Varn family is raising money for their blessing coming from China. They have both a place to purchase cute items (new being added) and a Dossier Prep and Fundraising Consultant business.- "Cori's List-Shop Raising Money for Adoption"
"Dossier Prep and Fundraising Consultant". Added 11/10

(20)Show Hope Store-Proceeds from all products go toward helping some of the most vulnerable children.
"Show Hope Store". Added 11/10

(21)Roma Boots-For each purchased, a pair will be donated to those in need.
"Roma Boots". Added 11/10

So many options and such a way to make a difference in a life. If you have any more sites that will make a difference, feel free to post them in the comments section and I will add them in the future!

GOD IS GOOD!


Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Thanksgiving Mother-In-Love

*Forgive the fact that this post says Wednesday, November 24th. We finished writing this post and recording the video today (Thursday the 25th). Blogger just shows the day I started it. Don't worry, I'm not losing my mind...I know Wednesday was not Thanksgiving.

Why does everyone in my family laugh when I say I'm not losing my mind?

Today is Thanksgiving. It didn't feel like the holidays were hitting until my husband pulled up to the curb in front of our house, break officially started. The kids ran out screaming. Let me tell you, I was SOOOOO thankful he was home.

Okay, that sounded bad (mischievous grin), but really...I love my husband and kids and always try to cherish every second God gives us together. It was just so nice to know break actually started.

I could list about a million things God has given me to be thankful for. His Son would trump them all. Yet, today...today is a special day. Today my husband's mom was born. We had hoped to be able to travel up to see her today. Unfortunately, our pocket book said otherwise.

She's had quite a year. You'll remember the constant prayer requests as she suffered a stroke. I don't remember either of us being that scared. She is GREATLY loved in our household.

I feel bad sometimes. I (personally) don't call enough. I get so caught up in every day life, that I keep on saying, "Tomorrow". Yet, we know in this life tomorrow isn't always there. I wish we visited more. We've suffered so much illness, that she has only met the twins once thus far. I'm not near what she deserves in a daughter-in-law.

My mother-n-law, Carolyn, has an amazing heart. She loves her kids and grand kids more than most can imagine. She raised my husband to have tenderness (he'll probably give a Tim Allen grunt when he reads that) and compassion. I will be forever thankful for the gift of my husband. She did something right and I hope I can give an inkling of that to my kids.

Without further ado, here is a message from my kids (and family) to their Memaw.
Mom-In-Love, we love you. May your birthday be full of blessings from above. We wish we could be there to hug you.



What I Do When My Daughter is Supposed to be Doing Homework

Yep, my daughter needs the computer, BUT mom is mean and isn't letting her do her homework (wink).

What's even worse is that we have a rule that there's no television, computer, or just about anything until homework is done. Told you...I'M Mean (evil chuckle).

Here's what we do with our spare time. We took this today and...well, though I'm a little bias, I think my kids are just too cute! Enjoy!



Now This Video Got Me-Another Miracle of Adoption

If you have stopped over here from the Adoption Story Blog Hop, you can find two of our adoption videos (and stories) at the links below. Hopefully by the end of the month we will have the twins wonderful journey documented.
"Max's Journey to Adoption (Russia)"
"Bekah's Journey to Adoption (Ethiopia)"

This has been a busy week, so when I got permission from a friend to use her video on this blog, I hadn't watched it yet.

I was so behind in blogging and email that I didn't even know she had put one together!

I watched it for the first time this morning. Try to keep the glimmer of water from your eyes as you see them meet their precious blessing for the first time.


To find out more about their journey, check out their blog!
"Texas to Ethiopia".

If you have an adoption video you would be willing to share, I would be honored to share it here.

"Delight yourselves in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4



Tuesday, November 23, 2010

More Ways To Shop With A Purpose

I was reminded yesterday (on the blog "Our Journey to Baby Boz") of a major brain hiccup. On "A Place Called Simplicity" there is a post with MANY links to items you can purchase that will make a difference beyond the purchase itself. Check it out!

"Shoppin' With A Purpose"
Please also keep Linny's (from "A Place Called Simplicity" husband in your prayers. He was in an accident yesterday and, though he's actually home, it was a miracle he survived. Also, please keep her mother in your prayers as well.

FINALLY, there are some ADORABLE dolls and t-shirts that are being sold to benefit the Young family's adoption. Seriously cute! They are almost to their goal and could used continued support. I am IN LOVE with the dolls! Find it here!
"Some Youngs"

Monday, November 22, 2010

Boyd Family Adoption Video

If you have stopped over here from the Adoption Story Blog Hop, you can find two of our adoption videos (and stories) at the links below. Hopefully by the end of the month we will have the twins wonderful journey documented.
"Max's Journey to Adoption (Russia)"
"Bekah's Journey to Adoption (Ethiopia)"

I LOVE the beauty of adoption homecoming videos. This month I have permission from a few friends to share their videos here on our blog.

This first video is from a sweet family that led us to the agency we used to bring home the twins. They were awesome and provided us with so much info! Enjoy watching God bless their socks off!!!


You can find more of their journey at
"Adoption Memoirs".


If you have an adoption video you would be willing to share, I would be honored to share it here.


"Delight yourselves in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

Sunday, November 21, 2010

More Ways to Shop With A Purpose!

*If you are here from the "Adoption Story Blog Hop", you can scroll down to read how God blessed our family!

I don't know about you, but I LOVE the idea of making a difference with our Christmas shopping!

If the funds present themselves, that's our plan.

There are some cool things out there that will make a difference beyond a gift being given to our children or family. There are items, that when purchased, make a difference in the life of an orphan or those in need. How cool is that!

I have a few more items to share with you!

The Ordinary Hero Blog is selling a COFFEE TRAVEL TUMBLER!!! For every tumbler sold and adopting family benefits! It goes straight toward their adoption. They have 54 adoptive families that will be receiving the profits. Check it out!

"Ordinary Hero Blog-Coffee Travel Tumbler"

The next item is a cute idea for young children. For every Scentsy Buddy sold, the Creveling family receive the profit to use for their adoption! Just order from this site and email the owner (Click the "Contact" tab) and let them know it's for the Creveling's adoption!

"The Creveling's Adoption-Scentsy Buddy"

This next one is a big favorite of mine :)! AHOPE for children has an orphanage in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia specifically for HIV positive children. It's a wonderful way to make a difference in the life of a child affected by HIV. Every item you purchase from AHOPE is step to making this world a better place for a blessing of God.

"The AHOPE Store"

If any of you stopping by our blog are fundraising, or know of other people who are, please don't hesitate to let me know!!!!

You can check out "Ways to Help" under KAT'S "KAT"AGORIES to the right and find more ways to shop!

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Ukrainian Government Moratorium on Adoptions

I just found that the Ukrainian government may put a moratorium on all international adoptions until new adoption laws are in place. This (if we use other countries as an example) may take years. Some children may not have years. The vote is soon. If the new law is passed, all international adoptions will cease. Children will remain in institutions instead of their parents arms.

Obviously, we want adoption to be ethical and legal and revamping laws is not a bad thing. There is just another way to do it. They have the ability to keep adoption open while the new laws are being written and implemented.

We are fighting for our sweet little ones my friends. They are OUR responsibility. They have no one else.

satan (lack of capitalization is purposeful) doesn't want our children to hear about Jesus.

he doesn't want these children to rest in places of love.

With God on our side, we know who wins. Let's be champions for the fatherless...

To read more and find out how you can help, please click on the link below...and pray.
"Their Lives Depend On It"

Our Journey to Bekah

This is the repost of Bekah's adoption video and story for National Adoption Month 2010. God has blessed us so much. Over three years ago we were privileged to travel to the beautiful country of Ethiopia. Since then our family has grown by two more and we've traveled to Ethiopia yet again. If you would like to read/see about our journey to Max, you can click on the link below. Hopefully later this month we will have Rachel and Gabe's video and story written. May God touch your hearts and bless you as He has blessed us.

"Our Journey to Max"

Thankfully all the children pictured in the orphanage now have forever families. We wouldn't post them otherwise, for their own safety. We want to say how honored we are to have been allowed to call Bekah our daughter. We thank God first and foremost. He has blessed us beyond measure. Next, we thank the Ethiopian government for allowing us to parent our sweet treasure called Bekah. Last, we want to say thank you to all of you who prayed for us...such amazing blessings occurred through your wonderful prayers.


BEKAH'S STORY

Ten years ago my family and I arrived back in the United States after being stationed in Germany. Unfortunately we brought something back that we didn’t plan on….non-active Tuberculosis. Let me tell you, as parents, this is a scary diagnosis to hear coming out of your doctor’s mouth. Thomas, Tom, and Sarah all had non-active TB. For those of you that know me, I am very rarely away from my children. How did they get it? Who did they get it from? Why didn’t I get it? It was a mystery to us. As the primary caregiver to all my children, it remained an unknown.

With a giant sigh of relief we found that TB is fairly easily curable, nine months of medication, but easily curable. We wondered at that point…honestly…what the point was.

It took ten years to get that answered…. but let me get to that later.

____________________________________________________

We were very busy with four children (Tom/12,Sarah/10, Anna/6, and Max/4 years old). Being parents is the hardest and the best job there is.

As a family we remained active in the kid’s school. I (Kat ) headed an “Outreach” program at their school. It is a priority to us to bring into our children’s lives a since of giving, of making a difference. During an "Outreach" is where the seed, the slightest inkling of Bekah’s existence in our family was started.

Every year, at the the school, we do an “Outreach” called “Gods Little Lambs” which comes to the aid of orphans. I sat down at our computer and Googled (our search engine) “Russian Orphans + Number”. Up popped the results, Ethiopian orphans topping the list. Seven percent of the population seemed unreal at the time. We could not comprehend that one out of six children would die by the age of five. Could a nation have that many orphans? It was astounding. A few days later we found an email from our Agency and they had started an Ethiopian program. We weren’t looking for it, the information found us. The next week an Ethiopian Grocery moved in down the street. Within a short time Tom started studying the Ethiopian Eunuch at Church. Days later a “National Geographic-Africa” showed up. It continued and continued. God was trying to get our attention. He succeeded.

Bekah was slowly being planted in our hearts. After seeking God, petitioning Him, pleading with Him to make it clear…our path…we found Bekah…or the knowledge that we had a child waiting for us in Ethiopia. It’s amazing when that knowledge is presented to you, how quickly you feel the void in your family. How quickly you realize it was never complete and you’re missing a vital component.

After seeking an agency, we proceeded at an alarming speed. Again, things that were taking months took half that time. We were flying. Having been given the knowledge that we were to expect 18 months from signing the contract to bringing our child home, we prepared to wait. Approximately six months after signing our contract we received our monthly email from the “Co” agency we were working with (Inter-agency Adoption). Toward the bottom of the email there were pictures…new pictures of little ones that were just admitted to Horizon House Ethiopia. Waiting Children. These children were either out of the age range most wanted OR, as was in our case, considered Special Needs children. These children had either questionable Hep B status or a number of other ailments. Ayane (EYE-ANNA) , as we knew her then, had a lump on the side of her neck. It was extremely visible and of great concern to the nurses there. She was tiny, at a year…only 14 ½ lbs….the size of an average three or four month old in the U.S. . She could only sit up by herself…nothing more. She sat there with her HUGE eyes in a boy’s dark blue polo shirt, spit up decorating the collar. Her arms hung limply at her side like any sort of movement was beyond her. At the time the email stated that she was 15 months old….we had stated the age range of a maximum of one year old. She barely was outside of our age range…but there was something about her….a connection.

When Thomas FINALLY (that’s the way it felt) arrived home from work I (very casually) said to him “Oh honey,” I faked a laid back voice “we received the monthly email today and there is this beautiful little 15 month old girl on it named Ayane”. I waited. Thomas cocked his head at me and smiled, he said “Well, why isn’t she ours?”.

That is how our journey to bring Bekah home began. After a week of petitioning God (not just us, but Mark and Michelle, Amy, our Church's Prayer Chain and of course Mom) we were matched with our little sweet Bekah.

We then started the planning. We were given a beautiful baby shower by some wonderful women at Church. Items were being collected to donate to the orphanage by friends, our school, and the Church. Two children at Church, Madeline and Daniel, had birthday parties and instead of gifts asked for monetary donations for the orphanage. We received pictures of our quickly transforming baby. Her medicals stated the end conclusion was that she had Tuberculosis in her lymph nodes. It’s funny how ten years later we find the reason for that TB from Germany. It didn’t scare us. It wasn’t an unknown.

We also waited…and waited for the travel email. We shared with other adoptive parents as they got their travel email and struggled to just walk in faith and wait knowing our time would come. Tom and I danced (literally) and screamed around the house when we finally found out that we would be in travel group #42!

We set our airline tickets for May 29th through June 9th, ten days in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. Tom (our 12 year old) and I would be traveling. It was too far for both Thomas and I to be away from all our kids. We packed and repacked. We practically brought a pharmacy, and ended up needing very little of it. Isn’t that the way it usually is?

As the day approached we started to get that anxious, nervous, butterfly feeling. We were actually going. Bekah, or Rebekah Ayane Emmali we would call her, was within reach.

I kissed our amazing kids (except Tom) goodbye with tears in my eyes, and we boarded our Lufthansa flight heading for Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.

The flight seemed to take an eternity. We were so thankful for the portable DVD player for Tom (there were some questionable movies on the flights) and for each other’s company. After 31 hours in transit we FINALLY arrived in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. Mulat, our Wide Horizons driver, was there to greet us and all our bags (four overstuffed ones) arrived in Ethiopia with us (yea!).

We grabbed some Birr (Ethiopian currency) and bottled water at the airport and proceed out into a dark starless night and a light, but steady downpour. We didn’t care, our feet were on solid ground and we were within minutes of meeting our reason for being there.

As we climbed into an older van, some chipped paint and faded posters on the inside, the windows quickly fogged up. The only thing I remember seeing is a glowing Sun Microsystems sign. Of course Tom remembers differently, he remembers the glowing “Denver Broncos” sign…lol…of course.

As we turned into a dark alley, ramshackle shacks surrounded us on either side. It was odd…at the end of the alley as we closed in you could see big, beautiful gray gates. Barbed wire surrounded the compound and broken glass set in concrete. We pulled in front of the gates and Mulat honked the (odd sounding) vans horn…it sounded like a toy car from inside the van. A uniformed guard pulled open the gates. In front of us was a three-story building …three balconies and fairly nice looking. To our left was a low setting row of what looked like multiple rooms….almost like you would expect in a school. They were light brownish with corrugated tin roofs. Women dressed in white stood outside and looked at us curiously.

We quickly took our bags upstairs and hurled back down to meet our beautiful little girl. The women in white turned out to be the nannies that took care of all the precious children.

This orphanage is wonderful and the love these children get is immeasurable. There is usually one nanny (at all times) to every 6 to 8 children. What is hard to comprehend is that many of these children are alive because of the wonderful nannies and the nurses there. Most come in SEVERELY malnourished within weeks or days of dying. Not all orphanages are as wonderful as where Bekah was, but most are gifts of our Heavenly Father. They help save the of these orphans.

As we shed our shoes before entering Bekah’s nursery we immediately see the walls lined with cribs. The outer edge of the small room had every inch filled with either a crib or bassinet. To our left…in the very first crib a curly head laid with a slight sheen of sweat. As we crept closer we could slowly see her beautiful glowing skin and her long eyelashes, shut in a heavy sleep only infants experience. When asked if we wanted to hold her, of course the answer was “Yes”. Maybe not the best answer we found out. Bekah did not like being woken up and handed immediately to strangers, which is what we were to her at the time. We then learned she could scream…lol. I felt so bad. Wondering (remember we had been traveling for 31 hours) if I ruined our relationship forever. Ok, so I wasn’t really super rational, but was walking on adrenaline alone. Tomorrow was another day.

The night echoed in silence, broken only by the sounds of the stray dogs, which are common on the streets of Addis Ababa. Tom and I tried to get comfortable sharing a queen size bed as the sheets popped off every time we turned over and the calls to prayer started resounding off the walls at about 3:00am. Finally when first light broke over the horizon we stepped out into the chilled air of our balcony to see Ethiopia for the first time in clarity. We noticed again the walls of the compound and the glass along the top, but for the first time we saw beyond the gates, not hindered by the darkness.

The compound is surrounded by shacks….miles and miles of poverty. Corrugated tin roofs falling off of broken walls made of whatever material the families inhabiting these could find. Cardboard, planks of broken wood, trash bags, plastic tarps, every material you could imagine was used to hold these threadbare walls together. It was cold too. Ethiopia wasn’t this vast country of perpetual heat, but Addis Ababa, because of its altitude, was cold. We went inside to our heated room and just sat. What world had we entered that this much poverty abounded?

As we peeked out the curtains once more we noticed activity in the courtyard. The nurses were awake and you could see children, toddlers peeking out the small rooms with their beautiful wide eyes. Practically inhaling breakfast so we could get to Ayane, we made our way out of the guest house, with a little bit of trepidation, not knowing if Ayane would ever talk to us again without screaming. As we stepped up to Ayane’s room we saw the children milling around, playing, sitting on the Nannies laps. A few children were in their cribs, struggling to wake still, while others screamed in glee at the hard plastic green ball flew right past them. There was Bekah in her pink jumper and t-shirt that was too small and would not button all the way. Though there were many donated clothes, they made do with what was on hand to get this many children dressed day in and day out. Ayane sat on her nanny Alem’s lap. She looked happy and secure, like the fright we gave her the night before never happened. We shed our shoes and sat on the floor trying to tempt her with an electronic phone that lit up and played music. She was curious, but took the phone back to her nanny. This was soon to be taken by a precious little guy named Eyob. The lights and sounds were just too much for the boys to resist. Ayane didn’t really seem interested in us. She came to Tom briefly, but she already had the women she was attached to…her nanny, she didn’t seem to feel she needed us at this point.

Unfortunately, it was time for Nurse Askala to give Ayane her shot and crushed pills. Once a day Bekah had to have the largest shot I have ever seen. It was the only thing available. She would scream as the shot went in (I think I would too) and fought the foul tasting pill. We were later to find out the injection, though effective, was highly toxic, and was changed to a different oral med upon entering the U.S.

After her meds and interacting a little we edged her to the courtyard to play in a walker that was slowly falling apart. She didn’t like going anywhere with strangers. After a few successful and and a few unsuccessful attempts we decided staying in the line of sites of the nannies wouldn’t help her to see us as anything but kind hearted visitors.

The first day was not easy. She fussed, as any child would being handed to strangers. We played in the common room…rolled stacking toys like wheels across the floor, and generally tried to distract her. When it was obvious she was tired, we took her up to our room and rocked and sang to her as she cried herself to sleep.

Ayane falling asleep on me was like a piece of me falling into place. Her curly hair tucked against my chest, her long eyelashes brushing me as the feel of her sweet breath warmed my heart. “ This is my daughter” I thought, “The daughter of my heart”. There may be trials. There may be adjustments, but this little girl sound asleep at my breast was part of us, of me.

Returning her to the nannies was a hard thing to do, though necessary for her and for us. It was a necessary part of her transitioning into our family. Sitting down to eat that night, waiting for the other families in our group to get there, Ayane was never far from our thoughts.

In the morning after visiting with Ayane, this time she was even less thrilled to see us, fearing being taken away from her wonderful nanny, we decided to accompany our Social Worker, Erica, and Ayane to the “Big Kids” house. The place where the older children waited to find the family that lay in their future. We were going to take them to the Hilton to swim.

Climbing in the elderly van we had ridden in before, we waited as the guards pulled open the gates to a world we couldn’t imagine. Walking down the street we noticed a man in a three-piece business suit, hand in pocket, just like in the states. Yet next to him, surrounding him, was a poverty level we had not experienced before. Steps away from this “up and comer” was a woman, looking like her feet were weighted, every step an effort. Her clothes hung in rags on her body. Her shoulder blades poked through like knifes that would cut a cake. Dirt caked her from the dust we found surrounds Addis. She looked as if tomorrow was a dream for her that may never happen. This is not far from reality for many living in the beautiful country where many live on less that $100 a year.

The streets were lined with shops, the likes of that we had never seen. They were the shacks that were so prevalent, with the fronts open to the street as they sold their wares. Along the streets you would see a lump, some covered with thin blankets. We saw a yellow heap along the side of the road, the yellow blanket covering this, one of God’s children, from head to toe. This blanket was nothing against the cold of the morning. Women and children sat huddling on grass along some of the giant thorough fares looking like they hadn’t eaten since the week began, having no home, no place to lay their head. Driving along new four lane roads, donkeys and goats would be herded by. Beyond the store fronts, large building were taking shape as the workers climbed the raised scaffolding made of branches, not wood or metal like we were used to seeing.

As we pulled up to the “Big Kids” house. It looked like a yellow wall, surrounding a building, surrounded by even more rooms. We walked into a cement courtyard filled with children. Many were smiling and laughing, some had a haunted took that filled their eyes. We were to find out later these were usually the children that had been only recently relinquished (or found) by a relative or the Kebele. Being introduced to the kids, I took pictures of the children whose parents were waiting in the States. We hoped to make their wait just a tad easier for them. The older kids of this group were waiting eagerly to pile into the van for our swimming excursion. I remember meeting a little girl named Aberdeet, who prayed every night for the other children to find families, and hoped to one day have one of her own. She suffered, in her young 12 years of life, from the results of polio. She hobbled, limped severely, but there is no other way to put it, was stunningly beautiful. We fell instantly for this precious girl. What she didn’t know at the time is that she did have a family waiting for her, they just couldn’t tell her due to waiting for a final approval. I called Thomas that night and said, “Are you sure you don’t want six children? I’ve just met a little girl named Aberdeet.”

As we walked with Erica to the back of the buildings, she called us aside. Asking us (another adoptive parent and I) how old we thought two of the children that they just admitted were. Many parents when relinquishing their children will tell their kids to say they are younger than they are. They do this because they know that they will have a greater chance of being adopted this way. The kids will promise they are years younger than they are and there is no convincing them otherwise. Often it takes a doctor and educated guesses to truly find out. We guessed the ages of the two boys and a quickly as that got ready to go.

We piled on the van, Ayane finding comfort in Tom and I (the familiar) as she snuggled into my chest. It felt a little like a clown car, children kept piling in, sitting on each others laps, giggling, waiting until the metal beast closed it’s door and rumbled onto the street.

As we pulled up to the Hilton, automatic weapon hung off of armed guards outside. We pulled passed them and stared at the opulence surrounding us. A circular drive led to the high rise hotel surrounded by palm trees and uniformed Conciers. Run down taxi’s lined the drive. Our van had arrived. We piled out, only to go through metal detectors so that we could enter this lavish establishment. Expensive shops surrounded us. High-end restaurants filled the bottom floor. The stark contrast to what was outside the gates was shocking.

We filed (well that’s probably not the right word when you have a bunch of children) we rolled, laughed, shoved, joked our way to the changing rooms and then plunged to the shallower pool. Ayane and I sat on the sidelines on deck chairs, under the shade of umbrellas, and fed the birds Cheerios. To this day I think Bekah Ayane still thinks she’s feeding the birds when she throws Cheerios in the car.

Many of the children couldn’t swim. They would hold on to the side of the pool or walk along the shallowest parts. Tom joined in the fun and the children quickly realized his love for them. The language barrier didn’t stop the joy on the kid’s faces as Tom carried them across the pool. Back and forth, back and forth, he would take two kids at a time and didn’t stop. Eventually Tom came to me, his feet aching. As I looked at the bottom of his feet, I noticed the blood. He had walked the kids across until his feet were raw. He still didn’t stop at that point. He knew it was one of his only chances to make a difference to these kids. Though his feet bled, his heart had swelled to partake the compassion of Christ toward the little ones of this world.

We went home tired, but happy. Ayane had relied on us, the familiar, for her safety. She had laughed…fed the birds, and fell asleep under the umbrella on my shoulder. God is and was good.

The next day would come to be one of the most difficult of our lives. We were going to meet Ayane’s birth father.

Fitzhughm, our driver, showed up early the next morning. He had the first new car we had seen, a SUV prepared to take on some of the dirt roads we would face that day. Knowing there would be nowhere to stop to eat, toilet paper, and restrooms. We prepared accordingly. Normally we would stay in the city of Hosanna (the city where we were to meet Ayane’s biological father) overnight, but with the rainy season coming early, many of the roads to the small villages were made of dirt and were wet. Overnight wasn’t a possibility. We said goodbye to Ayane, the trip being too much for her to take, and climbed onto the leather seats of Fitzhughm's vehicle.

Side note: The thing about the Ethiopian people was that they have so much inner joy that most American’s have yet to master. Many people we met may not know where there next meal will come from, but the joy on their faces would shame many Americans. They had so little and yet….what joy!

As we exited the city we continued to be awed by what we saw. Women, trying to make a small bit to help their families live, carried half their height in sticks and straw across their backs. It was often almost as wide as the street, their backs stooped, the strain laid on their faces, stopping every few yards to suck in what little oxygen their lungs would hold.

We were carried out of the city into another world. As we drove, country surrounded us. Acacia trees lined the countryside, surrounded by overgrown grasses and beautiful hills. In the distance a hut would rise from the fog, a small child by himself would be running around naked from the waist down, a shirt barely hanging on him, yet you could see the curiosity of childhood playing across his face. As we drove farther, we would see in the middle of no where, a young child…maybe 9, carrying a two year old sibling swaddled on her back along the side of the road, no civilization in site. We would pull into villages, goats clogging the roads, a horn a constant in our ears. Swarms of people, just walking, some barely clothed, all thin, clogging the arteries of the town. It was more than once we found our self praying as we almost hit one of these proud Ethiopian people. Many women had headdresses or had a child swaddled on their back.

In the country side oxen pulling plows could be seen on the farmland…often a young boy or a man plodding beside. As traffic slowed we would see children and Fitzhughm was used to us asking him to stop. Tom would give them a few pieces of candy and greet them warmly. These children were lovely. They would smile, flies often crusting their eyes, clothes falling a part. The warmth they showed us we will always remember.

As we would approach a semblance of civilization our hearts would often be heavy as we saw the repeated scene of litters being carried out of the homes. Covered with whatever blankets they had, would be the bodies, death having claimed them. The litters would be surrounded by people, hope lost on their face, trying to see tomorrow. Unfortunately, this was an all to often occurrence for us to view.

We finally arrived, on much of which had been dirt roads, at Hosanna and pulled up to a dilapidated building, painted in a light green. There we were ushered to a room where a man stood…thin, his clothes clean, his face vacant…he stood shorter than us.

*This is where the story belongs to Ayane. We have to leave many details out, knowing Ayane has the right to hear them first.

As we came out of the meeting with a mixture of pain, sadness, frustration, we felt blessed by this opportunity. It was often difficult having to have two translators, one to Amharic, and then from Amharic to Ayane’s native dialect. Her father would often talk for 5 minutes and we would receive a five word sentence. We gave him a photo album and a letter (translated). We found from this interview that he couldn’t take care of a baby with his wife gone, it was too much. Ayane’s brothers at ages 13 and 6 were only 50 and 28lbs. She has two biological sisters as well, but we don’t have much information on them, which is common in this culture. We hope to help someday. Our hearts broke, we left a scattering of the pieces in Hosanna that day.

On our way back we experienced more of the wildlife. My children would never forgive me if I didn’t mention the monkeys swinging in the trees as we drove past.

The rest of our travel group had arrived by now. The group was filled with wonderful people from every walk of life. I fell in love with their kids, they will always be special to me.

I saw Bekah when we arrived from our trip. As we had planned, we now took custody of our little blessing. We took her to our room and gave her her first, albeit awkward bath. The children tended to smell a little like old towels. This is NOT to be insulting, but washing things easily is limited there. We washed things in the sink and hung them out on our balcony (only two rooms had these) or the roof. As we went to fill the tub we realized there were no stoppers. We plugged the hole the best we could with a towel, but still she screamed, from fear, from anger. We had taken her away from the ones who had fed her, clothed her, and loved her for three months. She was mourning, first her mother, then father, and now her nannies. We took her down to dinner in the clothes we had brought for her. Still barely in 6 to 9 months clothing (she swam in them) she was (we would find out) now only around 15 months old. Sinidu or Eskadar usually cooked dinner consisting of Ethiopian or Italian foods (cooked Ethiopian style). We ate spongy bread called Injera, hand dipped in many mixtures of foods. Though we tend to LOVE all foods (a little too much), we never completely got used to Injera. TC and I ate everything in small amounts, but our diet consisted mainly of the trail mix we had brought with us.

The next morning was pretty special to me. When I was awoken by the Orthodox call to prayer in the wee hours I found TC with Ayane curled up in his arms. He was already in love with his little sister, and she with him.

After only a few days was our Embassy appointment where we awaited Ayane’s Visa. Crowded with all those waiting in a cold cement building after passing through lines and check points, those who were adopting bypassed all those who had been waiting ahead of us. It didn’t seem fair, but as your back ached (no one used stroller) and screamed in protest from carrying a snuggling child (that you can’t bare to put down) we just went along with what everyone required of us. This was a big day for us. We could now take Ayane….Bekah Ayane home.

The rest of the trip was a blur. Yonas (our driver) took us to shop (of course) from a big modern mall, to small shacks along the side of the road. We went to a museum, visited the “Big Kid” house a couple of more times, and Tom passed time by playing Soccer with the awesome guards at Horizon House. Tom often surprised me, though I shouldn’t have been surprised. . As we would walk back from the “Big Kid” house, Tom would notice people, people in need of help. He would use his own money and ask the guard to walk him across the street to give to a mother and her small child.

People would ask me if Bekah was my child. She has my chipmunk cheeks. They just said my husband must be very dark (smile). It was hard with the language barrier to communicate how Bekah was entering our family. I love traveling, and because we felt comfortable, I think that came across and that’s why others didn’t automatically assume we adopted.

It was when visited another orphanage and I realized how blessed we were at Horizon House. This orphanage was run down, bare rooms, dirty beds. The children were obviously loved, but the quality of life wasn’t what Horizon House afforded.

Late one night we heard a commotion and saw large cars setting in the drive. Tom and I stumbled outside to find out what was going on. They were admitting children, about six from what we could figure out. The children were clean, but dressed in old clothing. They were so thin and their heads were all shaved. They looked so lost. A room was cleared for all these new babies coming in. We knew they would all soon have families, but all we wanted to do was cry. They were quiet as if they had lost hope. The pain echoed in each of their eyes. You could see their loss. They said all the children look like this when they first come.

Finally the day came for our goodbye and the final Coffee Ceremony. It had been reiterated to us from the day we received our travel email how important this ceremony was. Unfortunately they hadn’t reiterated this to Bekah Ayane that her nap would have to wait. The guesthouse filled with all those that loved these children. Those at the “Big Kid” house came over with songs they had prepared for our little blessings. Yet Bekah was tired…and cranky. She decided that it was time for a nap and screamed at the top of her lungs until everyone’s ears hurt….sufficed to say, we missed the ceremony. TC got a few pictures, but Bekah got a nap.

As we said goodbye, there were tears, lots of pictures and hugs and a lot of packing (we came back with a ton!). We loaded up the van. The luggage was literally 4 to 5 feet high on the top of the van. We packed inside with even the bigger kids having to set on parent’s laps much of the time. I believe our total in the van was around 17, if I remember right. It was CROWDED!

So, again looking like a clown car, we proceeded to the airport. Cars honked, we prayed, we swerved, we prayed, and we all laughed at the looks people gave our luggage at the top of the van, and we prayed it would stay on.

After having been through many international airports I thought I was prepared. It’s funny looking back at it now. We first went through security and had our bags scanned. Each passenger was taking around 10 minutes just to be processed by those taking the tickets. We then went and filled out about 20 minutes worth of paperwork and went to wait in the long customs line. We must have looked pretty pathetic because an airport employee came to us and moved us to the diplomat line (did I mention Bekah was screaming the whole time because it was past her bedtime and the airport scared her). After passing through customs we stopped to show our passports again to highly armed guards. By then we felt it our own personal challenge to make these serious guards smile…usually it worked. We finally made our way to our gate (which was behind glass) and went through another bout of luggage scanning. FINALLY we could set down. It was CRAZY! I know that this part wasn’t necessary to the story, but I still can’t believe how crazy it was.

After a very long 28 hours in transit we heard the call that we were landing at a familiar airport...home. Finally, after prayers, struggles, exhaustion, and more prayers we had made it back to familiar soil.

They strange thing is, when we landed, yes, it was with excitement, but it was also with a little sadness, a feeling that we had left a part of us behind. We had fallen in love with Ethiopia.

Though, when I saw my kids running to me, when I felt my husband’s arms around me, when Bekah looked around and saw her family, and when we felt complete at last I knew I was home…we were home.

God took a family and created an image of what He sees. A world of his children, adopted, loved, and one in His body.

We may be from different lands. We may have different colors of skin or different languages, but I thank God, because in that we found our family.

We love you Bekah.

Friday, November 19, 2010

ABBY IS DONE WITH CHEMO!!!!

Some may have commented on my "Praying for Abby" button. You've probably seen them everywhere!

This button was created for a precious little one that was adopted as a baby from Guatemala and, at three, diagnosed with leukemia.

You may notice I didn't capitalize leukemia. Not gonna do it, because as of today she is done with chemo and cancer free!!!!

After 986 days Abby Riggs is DONE DONE DONE with Chemo! Praise God!!!!

BIG OL' HAPPY DANCE!!!!!

Adoption Story Blog Hop

What a beautiful opportunity to share in a family's path to adoption! Check out this "Adoption Story Blog Hop" and read numerous adoption stories.

This is where it all started...
"Adoption Blog Hop Celebrating National Adoption Month!"

If you are popping over here from the Blog Hop, you can find our current adoption stories (new one coming hopefully by the end of the month) by scrolling down to "Kat's Kat-agories" (right hand column below).

Click on a picture below to read the story OR scroll below to enter your story.



I Can't Help It...It's Funny



On Following Jesus...

There are two things that are always the will of God and almost always dangerous: telling the truth and loving needy people. In fact, if following Jesus does not feel dangerous, I should probably pause and check to see if it is Jesus I'm following."
~Gary Haugen

Thursday, November 18, 2010

The Cost of Adoption-Repost for National Adoption Month

"My friends, adoption is redemption. It's costly, exhausting, expensive, and outrageous. Buying back lives costs so much. When God set out to redeem us, it killed Him."

- Derek Loux

You Know You're A Mom When.....

I needed a laugh today.

I've seen these lists everywhere and this one just fits me to a tee...

You know your a mom when.....

1. You have signed a check with a crayon.
2. There is a smell in your car that smells like something crawled in and died.
3. You are just as surprised when you sleep through the night as when your child does.
4. You consider it a major triumph if you shower by noon.
5. You stick a pacifier in your mouth to clean it off.
6. The only quiet place in the house is the bathroom (hopefully).
7. Everything you ever need is on the floor of your car.
8. You have time to shave only one leg at a time.
9. You cling to the high moral ground on toy weapons; your child chews his toast into the shape of a gun.
10. Your feet stick to the kitchen floor, and you don't care.

and a bonus...
11. You excuse yourself in a room (full of adults) to go potty.



Wednesday, November 17, 2010

TSA Body Scans and Protecting our Children-UPDATED!

I saw, for the first time, what the images from the Virtual Body Scans (that the airport will be requiring) look like. If they want to run away screaming "My eyes! My eyes!" from doing a virtual scan on me, it doesn't bug me too much.

BUT....

I then start thinking about my children...age 16, 14, 9, 8, 4, 1, and 1.

The following article is written from a Christian perspective and says exactly what needs to be said. There is something innately wrong with a professional, that is not a doctor, seeing my children naked (even virtually) OR legally being able to move their hands over my children.

The following blog post says things far better that I ever could....

"Four Reasons You Should Resist the New TSA Security Procedures (and How You Can)"

Update:
I wanted to add this link to my blog. This is a post about the experience of a woman going through the invasive pat downs that now take place by the TSA employees.
There was no option of a scanner even.
The thought of someone touching my child that way....
I don't think we will be flying for awhile.

"Our Little Chatterboxes-TSA Sexual Assault"

"They that can give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary
safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety." --Benjamin Franklin

Grandson's Death-Blessing in the Arms of Jesus-Prayer Warriors

My mom worked with a sweet woman named Kathleen for years. She's come out and visited us several times since our move.

Her first grandson was due to be born any day.

My mom just received a call and they had done and emergency C-Section. The baby, their blessing, died 40 minutes after birth.

Please pray for the Harold family. I cannot fathom what they are going through right now.

Child Soldier's Rehabilitation in Uganda

This world is so big. Ever since I read "The Hole in the Gospel" I've been praying for those who have been forced to commit atrocities as child soldiers. My heart breaks for these kids who are now turning into broken men.

God can bring healing though. Christ can bring hope. Let's continue to pray.

Click the link to see a video.

"In Uganda, Former Child Soldiers Struggle to Overcome Horrors of War"

Two Blessings for the Sisemore Family (Video)

Another video that shows you the blessing of every life. Special needs just means extra special.....

Thank you Tami for allowing a peek into your blessings.....


You can read more about this sweet family here....
"Till God Brings Them Home".

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Explanation of the "International Adoption Simplification Act"

I've been seeing that the "International Adoption Simplification Act" passed the House and is waiting for the Presidents signature. Seriously, I had no clue what it meant. It's some cool stuff my friends.

Apparently the Hague convention did away with some pretty necessary items. The "International Adoption Simplification Act" will allow parents in the United States to complete the adoption of siblings, even if one of them is 16 - 18 years old. Sadly, American laws now make teens 16-18 ineligible for international adoption.

It also allows adoptive parents to wait to immunize their children in the United States (within 30 days of entering the U.S.). In some countries immunizations are required to be given there (where the vaccinations may not be safe).

Shopping for Dube Bute and A New Adoption T-Shirt

Some of you may have seen an earlier blog about an opportunity to make a difference called "Hope for Dube Bute". It's amazing to me, the thought of changing the lives of a whole village living in poverty.

God is using this family to create an opportunity to bring health and healing to a VILLAGE! Think of the number of orphans that will NOT be created. Wow, it's humbling to see God work through this.

Apparently "Hope for Dube Bute" now has a one stop shop. I'm drooling a little over the HOPE necklace and the Military Hat. We can't currently afford it, but (hint) you may eventually see them on a giveaway here when funds are more fluid (okay, when funds are there at all :)). Check it out!!!
"Bow in the Clouds Gifts"

I also wanted to share with you about an adoption fundraiser. I was blessed to meet this adoptive family as they were deciding to start their amazing journey. They are selling t-shirts for their adoption and I LOVE LOVE LOVE one specifically. Look for the missing letters and you can guess which one :). Check out these cute t-shirts that are helping to bring their family together!
"Adoption T-Shirts".

Monday, November 15, 2010

The Effect of the Economy on Orphans-Repost for National Adoption Month

In the current economic climate, I’ve heard story after story of the struggle of many American families. I think we all have. There were 650,000 foreclosure filings - which include notices of default, auction sales and bank repossessions - issued in the first quarter of 2007. That represents one of every 194 households. We’ve heard of retirees losing the bulk of their investments that were supposed to provide for them. I think many feel the economy hitting them in the stress of their work environments…layoffs and cutbacks loom for so many. Government bailouts…a quick fix for a long term problem, but not a solution.

Unfortunately, we often forget that the economic situation in the U.S hurts more than just Americans. Many orphans wait in orphanages around the world. They wait for mommies to forgive them for writing on the refrigerator, for daddies to flip them, giggling, upside down. They wait for love. Some are in wonderful orphanages…as wonderful as they can get, not being a family. They get picked up and tickled. They get snuggled for a few minutes when it’s possible. They get fed. Unfortunately, there are other children in orphanages who lack the basic necessities of touch, food, and care. They rock themselves for comfort since it comes from no one outside them. They are not even on the U.S. weight charts. They may be so malnourished that it has now stunted the growth of their heads. Malnourishment starts with weight, then the height is affected, then finally the head circumference. This IS NOT some kind of scare tactic or even written to “guilt” anyone. This is the truth. I have seen it. We have seen it in our own precious blessings.

Many Americans are either financially hurting or fearful living in this insecure economy. Starting an adoption that may cost $20,000 at a minimum may be too daunting a task in this day. Children wait while we juggle finances and wonder what the future holds.

Please don’t think this is to say that everyone is called to adopt…that is a decision between you and God. This is to say that there are children that can’t even understand the concept of “three meals” a day or the concept of “snuggle time”. This is to say we as Americans…we as Christians need to question what we are doing. Are we even praying? Have we ever said to God, “It doesn’t matter what I think I can handle, what do you want me to do?”. This is not said to diminish the hardship or need of families domestically.

This economy is also hurting the agencies. I personally know of a wonderful agency that has blessed our family immensely. They are struggling along with all those businesses out there. Most agencies have humanitarian efforts around the world…if these agencies go under so do many of these efforts.

If they go under because of the lack of adopting families then the circle begins…the children need families, agencies facilitate this, families feel they can’t adopt in a climate such as this, agencies suffer, children don’t find families, agencies fail at the one job they care about, agencies humanitarian efforts start to disappear, the children/families don’t get the aid they need, more orphans are made, children need families, agencies facilitate this….do you see the circle?

This is heavy on my heart today. There is no easy fix. We need to be praying…praying for these children, praying for families to open their hearts that may not have previously, praying for the agencies.

God may not put it on your heart to adopt. You may be an AMAZING prayer warrior for these little ones...but please consider this…talking to God just once and saying,
“It doesn’t matter what I think I can handle, what do you want me to do?”

May God put His Hand on you all as you journey through life glorifying Him.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

I Am Not...

I am not....
a good person because I've adopted. I am a blessed person.

I am not...
rescuing a child. They rescued me with their sweet love.

I am not...
surrounded by real children vs.adopted children. They are all my real children.

I am not...
hearing God where He is not. I am hearing God where He is.

I am not...
listening to man. I am listening to God.

Max's Story (Russia)-Repost for National Adoption Month

In September 2003 God opened our hearts and welcomed in a little boy named Max. It was just the beginning for our family.

Max's huge eyes and winning smile has blessed us beyond belief. Again, we thank God...we live thanking God for the wonderful blessing of our son. Here is his story, both in video form and written.




OUR JOURNEY TO MAX

It was a normal Sunday, like any other Sunday when, while setting in church listening to a sermon Thomas and I both received this wild intense feeling of anticipation. You know that feeling in the pit of your stomach that either feels like a thousand butterflies or that you’re going to throw up. Neither Thomas nor I talked about it until after church was over, but when we did it was so odd. This is somewhat of how it went.

“Honey, I just got the weirdest feeling”
“Ya, me too”
“It’s like something big is going to happen! Really big!”
“Ya! I don’t if its going to be good or bad, but it’s gonna be huge!”

Through much nudging and a couple of good clunks over our heads, God brought into both of our hearts (separately) the knowledge that is was time to start the adoption process. My husband and I knew, before we ever married that we wanted to adopt. We knew the situations of the children. We had seen the programs and heard the stories (both good and bad).

The knowledge that it was our time to consider adoption came after 9 years of marriage and 3 biological children (our youngest being 2). We felt the call, in souls, in our spirit. We didn’t have the money, but when God calls you, you answer.

We decided to look for an agency first, though we weren’t really sure where to start…not really.

We looked everywhere until we found a wonderful Agency called “Hope International”. After the endless searching, researching, and phone calls, we dialed a number that changed our lives. We were not sure “Hope” was a Christian Agency and we weren’t even sure that we should call. That was until the previous executive director Susan answered the phone and we found that she was a member of the Church of Christ and had also attended the same University that we had! We had even met her previously. They also had a main social worker/adoption advocate that is a Christian as well (as well as their staff). Not only this, but their office was only 40 minutes away. We were to find out the many benefits of this later on. Everything started falling into place at this point.

Then we needed to decide where we wanted to adopt from.

My husband and I knew from the start that we wanted to adopt internationally. Children here in the U.S. need homes every bit as much as the precious children overseas. And though some are in deplorable situations right here in the U.S., the Institutionalized children in so many developing countries are struggling for even the basic necessities. Every child has a right to love, but international adoption just happened to be our decision. The only difficulty we saw was the “Hope” worked from countries that we had not yet considered. Russia and China were the predominate ones. We actually leaned toward China since we didn’t care what color our child’s skin was; only that he was ours.

But a strange thing happened, all through this process of choices, we had people constantly talking of Russia. We heard “My neighbor adopted from there” to” my sister used to work in a hospital there.”. None of these things changed our minds though. It was a little story about a young boy adopted by a couple like us that already had biological children.

This couple had biological children, but they always knew they wanted to adopt. When they went to Russia to pick up their two year old son he was wearing pink stretch pants and a thin sweater, that’s all he had. The orphanage asked for the clothes back, because they needed them.

We discovered Russia had around 700,000 orphans (since communism fell it had doubled). It has risen since we adopted in 2003 though. It has currently 880,000 orphans. For many of the children, human touch is an uncommon event. Most are malnourished and developmentally delayed. There are so many stories from so many countries, but Russia captured our hearts. The need is everywhere, but after much prayer and searching we decided on Russia.

We had decided to adopt a little boy (between 12 and 18 months old). T.C. (our oldest at 8) had stated quite definitely that he is "girl trapped" and Anna (our youngest) was just 2 when we began this adoption process and we felt it would be best to adopt younger than her.

Every roadblock we have had (and there have been some significant ones) God has provided a way. We had our home study. Now that was a stressful experience (totally us, not them)! We struggled to financially get everything together, but with help from friends and family and a lot of faith, God provided. We received INS approval. The approval, which usually takes about 4 months to receive back (after fingerprinting), took 2 1/2 weeks.

We then received our referral, a video of little Nikolai. He was (and is) beautiful. Nikolai was only 9 1/2 months old in this video and first thing we noticed about him were his liquid brown eyes. He was tiny with layers of clothes on including a little girl’s shirt. He kept one of his fists closed most of the time, which we have heard is common in many institutionalized children (he out grew this quickly upon arriving home). After what seemed like a long wait for the dossier to be accepted (that's a story within itself) we finally were able to receive a court date. Ten days later we left for Moscow, Russia. Max was 13 months old.

We arrived in Moscow too late on Friday to see Nikolai. As Gregary, our driver (also an engineer), took us to our apartment we were stunned at the buildings surrounding us. The history in Moscow is amazing. Even the most beautiful buildings had paint peeling and had none of the modern look we are used to in America. The streets and the buildings make you feel as if you’re living a part of history. Moscow celebrated its 856th year this year Gregary stated.

We learned very quickly that driving in Moskva (as Moscow is called) takes courage of its own. The lines in the street mean nothing. Pedestrians have no right-of-way. We were surrounded by the sound of horns blaring and these amazingly strong Russian voices yelling aggressively at other drivers. There are very few cars with seat belts. We found that you get in the car, close your eyes, and pray (smile) and we were ones that had an amazing driver. It's funny, after a couple days and you find your self totally relaxed after you have almost got in your 3rd accident of the day (smile).

We arrived at our apartment. It was in a beautiful old building that had a sense of history of it's own. We stayed in a small one bedroom, very European looking apartment. It has hardwood floors and these beautiful ancient looking chandeliers. It has a washer, but generally no one feels the need to have a dryer. You hang your clothes and iron them to complete the drying. It had a small kitchen, a living room, a restroom with a bath and is actually quite pretty. The front door is actually two very heavy doors, each with heavy bolts on both. One door swung outward (the outer door) and one swung inward (the inner door) – for added strength and safety. The halls and floors outside the apartment are cement, but functional and quite old (and run down). It had it's own unique Russian feel.

We woke up the following morning anticipating just being able to touch the littlest Marr. We arrived at a rundown two story building surrounded by what in the states would be considered the projects; huge apartment buildings that reeked of poverty. Outside the orphanage we could hear a single baby crying. . A strange smell invaded our nostrils….Cabbage and unwashed bodies (we would come to know). A vicious sounding dog warned us of his presence as we entered the outer courtyard. As we entered the building, we were immediately drawn up the stairs by our host. They led us through a maze of elderly corridors, Disney Characters decorating the walls. Finally they led us through a set of doors into a silent room. We were shown into Nikolai's group (#8) and all we heard was silence. Eleven children around the age of one...silent. One child was sitting (facing away) on a caregivers lap being spoon fed (as all of them are) with an adult large spoon and a small plate. All the other children were in a large sectioned off corner of the room. Maybe a couple toys were in with all these children and that was only once in a while. At most times at least 3 children were rocking to comfort themselves since they are so deprived of the love and attention they require. There was one child with Downs Syndrome who would set in a wet diaper that had soaked through her clothes. Another always stood a top a little platform in their penned area. Another little one was always rocking and tearful. Nikolai was standing at the wooden wall of the partitioned section. His eyes, those precious eyes. They looked empty…almost dead, from the severe neglect he endured. We recognized him immediately. One of the caretakers scooped him up and motioned us to follow her. She led us to a room lined with chairs with a table in the middle. It was fairly empty besides that. She plopped Nikolai our arms and left. Wow, what an introduction. We were finally holding our son….finally.

Sidebar: Before we go on we must say that some of these women do care, but are continuously dealing with (only 2 of them) 11 babies. They are not trained and have become somewhat desensitized. Most do not realize the basic necessity of touch and love these children require. Of course, we think that they also seem to realize that they can’t get too emotionally attached, since they never know how long a child will be staying. This is not always because of adoption, but also children may be moved from group to group.

Nikolai looked at us with his huge big brown eyes. He was finally in our arms!!!!! looked a lot thinner than the last picture we had and we were later told he had begun to lose weight recently. We were finally holding our son….finally. He looked down and played with our keys. We waited and we finally saw his eyes peek toward us and the heavens opened as he smiled.

We found out quickly how ticklish he was. You poked him and he cracked up. He was so sensitive to any touch. He was initially very stiff with us, as if he were not sure what his response should be. When we set him down for a brief moment he very quickly put his feet and hands on the floor (with his bottom sticking up in the air) and started rocking. We found out this was what he did when he was overwhelmed. We were told to expect the rocking and that this is normal in orphanages. We have loved and kissed on him daily since. He was very smart (we could see this even then) and he could melt your heart with his smile. We brought him cheerios and he was always hungry. When we asked if we could bring him food, we were told we could if we brought diapers for his whole group (which we were already doing). We had been told that the children only get 2 meals a day (milk for breakfast). He was and is such a blessing from God. We were able to take him outside for the very first time in his little life. He saw and touched his very first tree. He was able to see his first bird and a stray dog. He wanted to explore everything. He went back and forth from that and hesitation. We could see the strangeness of all this in his eyes. We went into his group with him. We couldn't just ignore these other children, but Nikolai showed us (for the first time) that he was starting to view us as his. He gave us such a look, not angry, just possessive (smile).

We went to court on a Tuesday. It took us an hour to get there. The building was older and the carpet did not fit on the floors. We went into the court room knowing now was what was going to determine our parental rights of Nikolai. The judge quizzed us and then let the 3 other people that have a say in this process speak. The Education minister stood and told of Nikolai’s past and how he was found by a police officer on a street corner in the very early hours of a cold morning in Moscow. She told of a search for his parents and of reviewing our life story in the documents she had. She recommended that we be awarded the adoption rights of Nikolai. Next the deputy director of the orphanage stood (we had a meeting with her the day before). She stated that she felt we would make a good family for Nikolai. The prosecutor then stood. Yes… I said prosecutor. She was the one we were most nervous about. The prosecutor’s job is to argue the negative. As she stood we held our breaths. She went over Nikolai’s vital statistics and then stated that it would be in the best interest for Nikolai to be adopted into our family!!! No argument! God was working yet again! Why should we even be surprised?! Nikolai was then legally ours, though we had to wait for actual custody until Sept. 30th.

His name is Max Nikolai Michael. Max after my father, Nikolai for his heritage, and Michael for the warrior/angel (because he's a little bit of both). He wasn't overly familiar with any name since it was so rarely spoken to him.

I was to leave the next day to come back to the states. So after court we headed straight to the orphanage. We were able to take Nikolai outside again. He was dressed in an unusual outfit as many are. They keep them clothed, but as with everything else they are very limited and though clothing may be made for a girl or boy, that doesn't matter. Nikolai was tired that day. He actually (for the first time) laid his head down and kept it there. My heart melted. Though Thomas would be there, leaving was not easy. I left and went back to the states to be with T.C., Sarah, and Anna, who needed me as well.

The orphanage worker told Thomas, while I was back in the US, that Nikolai cried for the first time when seeing Thomas leave. We had already seen what happens as a child cries. They may be moved to a different place, but no one holds them or comforts them in their tears. We have seen that Nikolai is a wounded child. You could see it in his eyes back then, when he rocked, when his lower lip stuck out a touch (but no tears surfaced). Many of these children don't cry because they know no one will come. Nikolai has a home now, and we are so blessed to be the ones to give it to him

On Sept. 28th, Anna (our 2 1/2 year old) and I returned to Moscow. Knowing we would be coming home with Nikolai (Max) was such a joy. Though for some reason this trip was a lot harder. Yes, having a 2 1/2 year old there could be "interesting" at times (smile), but that wasn't even it.

We arrived tired and bedraggled, but found we landed early enough to introduce Anna to her little brother. I could not wait to get my arms around our beautiful little boy and of course Thomas couldn't wait to see Anna either (he'd been away two weeks at that point).

For the first time we arrived at the orphanage at dinner. These were different caregivers than I had met last time. Max was unsure of what to think of me. He had seen a movie (on our video camera) of me daily, but still was not quite secure with me. The food soon arrived and they proceeded to plop Nikolai in a little wooden chair with a small table in front of him. As they motioned me over they sat a steaming hot bowl of soup in front of him (along with what looked like barely cooked hamburger and a curd type dish). Nikolai sat with his hands flat on the table for the entire meal. He did not reach out to grab the piping hot bowl, as most 1 year olds would try to do. It worried us at first and then saddened us when we realized why he did this. We watched as another child was being fed. We watched as they grabbed this 8 month olds head and literally wrenched it back into place when he tried to look at me. We watched them (also literally) shovel the food into this child's mouth at such a rate that most of it poured back out. This was what the bowl under the child's chin was used for….to catch the large amount pouring back out. They then took a teacup and poured tea into this child's mouth the same way. They did this for a few minutes then plopped the child back into the pen, very little food or drink having made it to the child's stomach. We wanted to cry, to be angry, to rail against this kind of treatment of any child, but we wanted Max out of there and knew doing that could offend the wrong person and make it hard to get Nikolai out of this situation.

The next day when we arrived at the orphanage we were told that we could take Nikolai for a walk. We changed his clothes (head to toe) and for the first time, we realized how grossly malnourished his beautiful little body was (as Thomas stated later, he had never seen a child look this way except on the commercials requesting funds for hungry children) (sigh). The day was beautiful as we walked with Nikolai in a broken down carriage with Anna trotting beside. It was one of those truly peaceful times we will always treasure. Certain areas we avoided because of the smell, but we were used to it by now. We watched as Nikolai's eyes lit up at each new sight and listened to his beautiful little giggle that was becoming a more frequent thing. It was a long way to come, but so worth it.

The next day was our big day, wow...we finally get to take Max into our arms and into our family (he was already in our hearts). It seemed as if it took forever to get to this day, though it really hadn't (6 months). As we walked in, we first met with the head of the orphanage and gave them the clothes that so many friends and family donated. They were amazed and thankful at the sheer number. We then were off to wrap our arms around the littlest Marr. He had just woken up and gave us that early morning sleepy little smile. We then changed him into the outfit we brought him (since they needed the clothes he was wearing back) and we said goodbye. There is one worker there that we will truly miss, so we were misty eyed as we said goodbye and received kisses on both cheeks. As we looked back at the children rocking back and forth in the pen trying to comfort themselves our sense of joy was dampened at the thought of leaving all these children behind (it's still hard to think about), but our own happiness still overflowed at the actuality of little Max in our arms.

The rest of the trip went so quickly. From the U.S. Embassy, to passports and visas, the Max's medical check, to finding ourselves in the middle of a communist protest surrounded by riot police (don't ask). Our bodies sagged with sheer exhaustion. We realize we have now seen a country and a life so foreign to our own, a life of such extreme contradictions. A Place where those on the Metro give up their seats to the elderly, yet children lay in orphanages malnourished, neglected, and looked down upon by many. A Place where the so-called joys of freedom have also brought the Russian Mafia and rampant pornography. You can't even watch the news without seeing nudity. A Place where Metro stations are ornate and marble covered and the buildings (tenements) lay falling down around them. Moscow is a different world, so beautiful and ancient, yet parts are so unimaginable.

Max is home now. He is the most loved child. He took his first steps his first night in our custody and T.C., Sarah, and Anna have kept him running ever since. His weight went up. We had some (we consider minor) adjustments/difficulties with sleep, and eating, and such, but he took such major strides each day. He struggled a little trying to figure out what his reactions/emotions should be (because of his lack of interaction the first year). After almost three years he only is a little emotionally young for his age.

Our story has been such an amazing journey that has changed our lives and perspectives forever. Max Nikolai Michael was what we consider our Miracle child. Each step of the way we saw Gods hand…miracle after miracle. There is not enough room here to even grant you more than a brief glimpse of what God has done for us through this. If you have or are considering adoption and you hear Gods call, please listen. He will take care of finances (if that is a worry). We didn't have it when we started. He will take care of you and the child he has for you, in all aspects. He will use you in ways you cannot imagine.

People have started asking us recently “Do you think you will adopt again?”.

There are millions of children out there, orphans out there. How can we say “no” with any certainty that we will not adopt again? This is a question we ask God.

You may ask, do we have the funds to adopt again? No, but that didn’t stop things before. What we do have is four wonderful children, a stupendous family, support of terrific friends, a fantastic Church and an AMAZING GOD, who has seen fit to bless us so abundantly. So to answer the question “Will we adopt again?” The answer, after all, IS very simple……what God wills…we will.
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Obviously, since this story was written, God did will. We now have SEVEN beautiful children....four of which are adopted. We have a house filled with love and BLESSED BLESSED BLESSED by God.



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